Ackman’s Tech Bets: Amazon, Alphabet, and the AI Gold Rush

Billionaire Bill Ackman spent Q2 playing investing Jenga-only instead of knocking over blocks, he stacked $AMZN and $GOOGL shares into his portfolio like a Wall Street sommelier curating a “vintage” year. His Pershing Square Capital now holds these tech titans like they’re the last two seats on a life raft headed to Davos.

Ackman’s portfolio? Less “diverse” and more “I’ve got 10 irons in the fire, but they’re all forged from the same $100 bill.” When this guy sneezes, retail investors rush to buy stock in Kleenex. So let’s dissect his moves with the precision of a CFO auditing a punchline.

Amazon: The Everything Store’s AI Gym

Pershing scooped 5.8 million Amazon shares-enough to make Jeff Bezos’ ghost whisper “I’m watching you” into every Alexa. Now 9.3% of their portfolio, Amazon’s logistics network is morphing into Skynet with better delivery times. AI now optimizes routes like a GPS on Adderall, spots damaged goods faster than a UPS driver after three espressos, and deploys 1 million robots who apparently “repair themselves” (sure, Karen).

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The real magic? AWS. Their cloud division grew 17.5% last quarter because apparently, everyone needs a server farm now. Custom AI chips? Check. AI agents in a “serverless environment”? Double check. It’s like Amazon’s building a tech utopia where even the coffee machines trade stocks. At 30x forward P/E, it’s not cheap-but neither is front-row Coachella real estate.

Alphabet: Google’s AI Buffet

Ackman also boosted Alphabet stakes by 8.6%-because why not bet on the company that answers “I’m feeling lucky” with “Let me Google my existential crisis.” Despite AI chatbots supposedly killing search (spoiler: they didn’t), Google’s ad machine printed $54.2B like a Quantitative Easing remix. AI Overviews? 2B users. Chrome dominance? 66% browser market share. This is the kid who sits front row in class, raises their hand for every question, and still finds time to tutor the teacher.

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Google Cloud’s 32% growth? That’s not a cloud-it’s a hurricane. Gemini models, TPUs, and quantum chips named “Willow” (because Silicon Valley loves a good metaphor). Meanwhile, Waymo’s robotaxis are basically Elon’s nightmares with better parking skills. At 19x 2026 earnings? Cheaper than a TikTok influencer’s stock photo package.

Final Thoughts: Buy, But Pack Dramamine

These stocks aren’t for the faint of heart. Amazon’s a marathon runner with a jetpack; Alphabet’s the chessmaster who’s also winning poker. Follow Ackman? Sure-if you’ve got the stomach for volatility and a therapist on speed dial. The AI hype train’s leaving the station, and these two are selling first-class tickets. 🚂

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2025-08-23 23:50