So, in a week when Bitcoin decided to throw itself a little party and reach record highs, our beloved crypto enthusiasts reminded us all that they absolutely love slapping their hard-earned cash onto some completely ridiculous, zero-utility coins. đđ°
Meet Pump.funâa place where you too can become a memecoin millionaire (or at least *try* to pretend you are). In a jaw-dropping spectacle, this Solana-based platform raised $600 million in just 12 minutes during a token sale. Yes, you read that right. 12 MINUTES! Let that sink in while you sip your lukewarm coffee. According to Bloomberg, theyâve hit a total of $1.32 billion, which is a number that makes my head spin faster than my latest Tinder dateâs excuses. đĽ´
This sale is not just any sale; itâs up there among the largest ICOs in the history of cryptocurrency! Whereâs my confetti cannon?! đ
Pump.fun broke the news on X (which used to be Twitter, but honestly, whoâs keeping track?), and guess what? Investors from the U.S. and U.K. are mysteriously absent from this money-making bonanza. I can only assume they threw in the towel to avoid any regulatory dramaâbecause nothing says âfunâ like adhering to financial rules, right? đ¤ˇââď¸
Founded in 2024 by a trio of geniusesâAlon Cohen, Noah Tweedale, and Dylan KerlerâPump.fun is basically a factory churning out memecoins faster than I can scroll through my social media feeds. The platform has already spewed out nearly $800 million in revenue since launching by letting regular folks create and trade joke tokens at the drop of a hat. Because who needs serious investments when you can trade a coin picturing a cat in a sombrero? đąđ
Now, memecoins, as we know, are themed around memes, famous people, or internet jokes that might just plummet faster than my high school GPA. The Official Trump coin (yes, thatâs a thing) has recently found itself hanging out at yearly lowsâtalk about a fall from glory! đŹ
Pump.funâs rise to fame comes as ICO-style fundraising has made a comeback, like that ex who just wonât stay away. Remember the 2018 bubble? Yeah, that was awkward. But now, the current administration is all about that crypto life. Forget what they said about the economy, theyâre in a *totally* different crypto universe. đ
And speaking of growth spurts, Pump.fun just made its first acquisition, buying wallet analytics tool Kolscan. I mean, why not make trading even *more* complicated? Kolscanâs bringing in real-time insights and a leaderboardâbecause we all know that trading can feel like a game of Monopoly gone wrong. đ˛
Co-founder Cohen, in all his glory, proclaimed that on-chain trading is a âsocial sport.â Because nothing says âteam playerâ like trying to outsmart your friend in a race to the moon. âšď¸ââď¸đ¸
Oh, and Bitget Wallet just launched MemeScan, designed for those die-hard, early-stage memecoin traders. If you thought trading wasnât fast enough, well, now you can make it even *faster*. Exciting stuff! đ
As for Pump tokens, theyâre set to be tradeable 48 to 72 hours after the sale wraps up. Just donât get too excitedâthatâs only slightly less painful than waiting for a pizza delivery on a Friday night. đâł
Of course, not everyone is thrilled about the token sale. Cohen has previously called presales âscams,â whichâsurprise, surpriseâhints at some âcontradictionsâ that are raising eyebrows in the community. Gate.io even took the liberty of listing PUMP for pre-market trading, then pulling it faster than I can dodge a question about my marital status. Yikes! đŹ
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2025-07-12 23:55