Crypto Shenanigans: Bitcoin’s Stroll, Ethereum’s Leap, and Coinbase’s Wild Ride!

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Last week, while our dear Bitcoin was having a leisurely stroll, Ethereum decided to take a flying leap, Coinbase was caught in a delightful pickle of good and bad news, and a Chinese firm unveiled its grand plans for BTC acquisition. Quite the spectacle, I must say! 🎢

This editorial is plucked from last week’s edition of the Week in Review newsletter. Do subscribe, dear reader, to receive the editorial faster than a butler can serve tea!

Bitcoin Ranged as the Rest of Crypto Moved

Ah, Bitcoin! Last week, it decided to play the role of the wallflower at the crypto ball. The week kicked off with Bitcoin briefly flirting with the $105,000 mark, as U.S. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent and China’s Vice Premier He Lifeng worked on their diplomatic tango to resolve the trade war. Despite the weekly bullish news, it feels like we’re all just waiting for the next big dance move. Last week, another Bitcoin treasury company with some rather hefty backers was announced, this time with the likes of BTC Inc. CEO David Bailey and Vaneck in the mix.

Next up, in what could be the start of a rather significant trend shift, a Chinese publicly traded company, DDC Enterprise (NYSEAM: DDC), announced plans to acquire a whopping 5,000 Bitcoin by mid-2027. The mere fact that a Chinese-linked company is publicly declaring its Bitcoin ambitions suggests that perhaps the Chinese government is softening its rather frosty stance towards Bitcoin and crypto. How charming! 🥳

While Bitcoin was busy twiddling its thumbs, the crypto market surged to a staggering $3.33 trillion, as altcoins like Ethereum, which has gallantly risen 44.8% from the lows, and others posted impressive gains, fueling speculation that an altcoin season may be just around the corner. However, despite the excitement, this altcoin season indicator remains a rather dismal 24—well below the 75 needed to confirm the trend. Oh, the suspense! 😅

Many have proclaimed the top of the BTC.D (Bitcoin Dominance) chart, or the bottom of the ETH/ BTC chart (a bottom that has been called for 18 months, mind you), but I’m sticking to my guns from last week. It seems more likely that Bitcoin will lead the altcoins with another leg up, probably topping in the lower 70% dominance range. Quite the prediction, eh? 🧐

Now, let’s talk about Coinbase, which had a week that could only be described as a rollercoaster ride. The highs: On Monday, S&P Dow Jones Indices announced that Coinbase would be added to the S&P 500, making it the first cryptocurrency company to join this illustrious index. Coinbase “is about to be in everyone’s 401K.” The lows: On Thursday, Coinbase announced that “Cyber criminals bribed and recruited rogue overseas support agents to pull personal data on <1% of Coinbase MTUs.” My best wishes to Brian Armstrong and the Coinbase team, who weather crises at a world-class level. What a week! 🎭

Let’s wrap up with a delightful grab bag of news. As a consistent critic of Pumpfun, it was hardly surprising to discover from Su Zhu that their 50% creator revenue share is, in fact, just an additional fee they’ve passed on to traders. That 50% share only applies to graduated coins, while for the “99%+ of coins which never graduate out of the bonding curve, the creator revenue share is a mere 5%.” Dastardly, I say! On a somewhat related note, this X post showing the change in Bitcoin ownership in 2025 is a bit of a downer. The individual share of Bitcoin holdings continues to shrink. As discussed in last week’s episode of Token Narratives, I can envision a future 100 years from now where 99%+ Bitcoin is owned by businesses or institutions. So much for upsetting the existing centers of power and money! 😱

Speaking of Token Narratives, last week marked the 1-year anniversary of the podcast! A round of applause for my co-host Graham Stone, who is more akin to the show’s host, while I’m more like a semi-permanent guest. I’ve missed a handful of shows due to my gallivanting to conferences. Also, a big thank you to Bitcoin.com CEO Corbin Fraser, who carved out time from his busy schedule in those early days of the podcast to lend it some legitimacy and ensure we didn’t suck too badly. I take the fact that he’s stepped away from appearing every week as tacit approval of our endeavors! 🎉

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2025-05-25 09:58