Metaplanet Doubles Down: Bitcoin Hoard Hits 7,800 After Buying 1,004 More BTC

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Ah, what a splendid spectacle we have here, dear reader! Metaplanet Inc. (Tokyo Stock Exchange: 3350 / OTCQX: MTPLF), that illustrious company from Japan, known for its modest dealings in the digital realm of Bitcoin, has just made an announcement that is bound to raise the eyebrows of even the most stolid investors. The company, in a most calculated move, has acquired yet another 1,004 bitcoins, bringing their total to a rather decadent 7,800 BTC.

Not that they needed to, mind you. But why not? When you have the resources, why not indulge in a little more digital gold? The latest acquisition, at the entirely modest price of 15,134,304 yen per bitcoin, has cost them a mere 15.195 billion yen. A trifle, really, if we are to believe the theatrics of modern finance.

And what do they have to show for it, you ask? A BTC yield of 41.7% for the quarter between July 1 and September 30, 2024—oh, how delightful! And for the following quarter, a jaw-dropping 309.8%. One can almost hear the champagne corks popping in the executive suites as they count their newly accumulated riches.

Metaplanet Inc., in its infinite wisdom, has stated that it continues to enhance shareholder value through its “Bitcoin Treasury Operations”—a noble pursuit, indeed! The grand aim, of course, is to increase those precious bitcoin holdings while minimizing the rather less glamorous prospect of shareholder dilution. Because who wants dilution when one can have 7,800 bitcoins instead?

The world watches, dear reader, and applauds. Or perhaps they simply sigh in admiration of a company that clearly knows the value of a good acquisition when it sees one. 💸✨

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2025-05-19 08:57