- Guess what’s rarer these days than a polite internet comment? Bitcoin on exchanges. Poof!
- Chart-wizards are clutching their crystal balls and screaming: parabolic BTC rally straight ahead!
The Bitcoin (BTC) market just got a hefty financial injection, probably the only needle that won’t make your mom call you. Institutional investors have been pouring in over the last couple years, licking their lips as governments (looking at you, El Salvador and USA) start eyeing the Bitcoin cookie jar to deal with that cute little thing called national debt. Oh, and inflation! 😂
On-chain detectives over at CryptoQuant have noticed that in just two years, almost a million BTC have vanished from centralized exchanges, leaving them with a sad little pile of 2.4 million coins. Since the total supply is forever capped at 21 million (bitcoin’s version of “no more pizza after midnight”), and the HODLers are basically glued to their stash, things are about to get as tight as your jeans after Thanksgiving. Brace for supply shock! 🍟
Nakamoto Holdings and KindlyMD: One Weird Trick to Pump Your Portfolio
If you like your finance with a twist of “wait, really?”, KindlyMD (NASDAQ: KDLY)—a healthcare provider (I know, just go with it)—decided to join forces with David Bailey’s Nakamoto Holdings. Together, they’ll form a publicly traded Bitcoin treasure chest, or as your uncle calls it, “the thing that’s going to the moon, Jerry!” 🚀🌕
Hot off the press: they’ve locked down $710 million (!) to buy Bitcoin, meaning they’re about to shop harder than you at a Black Friday sale. The new super-company is joining a VIP club of 193 other BTC-hoarders—including Strategy and Metaplanet—currently sitting on over 3.3 million BTC. That’s a lot of digital gold, and considerably fewer pirates.
“Nakamoto’s vision is to drag Bitcoin into the center of Wall Street’s cocktail party, dress it up in equity, debt, hybrid-something-or-other, and hand it out like hors d’oeuvres. Soon you’ll see these instruments everywhere—good luck hiding from them!” – David Bailey, who really wants everyone to own Bitcoin (or at least buy him a drink).
BTC Price: The Parabola You Actually Want
If you’ve looked at past four-year Bitcoin cycles, you already know: grab your moon boots. The official charts say BTC is tap-dancing into the “euphoric phase” of 2025’s bull run. According to some serious price math (and a pinch of hope), there’s a real chance for $250k to $350k before year’s end. Not financial advice, but do try not to faint.
On the technical side, the monthly Relative Strength Index (RSI)—Bitcoin’s version of a Fitbit—likes to hit 90% right at the top of every monstrous bull cycle. And that fancy pants MACD line? Still doing the limbo above every key marker, riding a wave of bullish energy (and possibly too much coffee). BTC’s party might just be getting started. 🎉
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2025-05-12 22:29