Bank Employee Pulls a Sneaky: Customers’ Secret Stash Revealed 😱

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Once upon a time (last summer, to be exact), in a grand old building stuffed with cash and clever accountants, a cheeky insider at TD Bank decided to do a spot of sneaky peeking—not chocolate bars, but data! Before anyone could shout “Oi, you there, what’s all this then?” the rascal tiptoed away, leaving customer secrets—a whole 43 baskets of them—scattered hither and thither.

The bank boffins, scratching their heads with puzzled expressions, only uncovered the mischief months later. Apparently, eagle-eyed security was more “ostrich with its head in the sand”. Notices are being sent out, fluttering through the mail like confetti at a burglar’s birthday.

Fancy having your name, birthday, phone number, address, account details, and even your Social Security number on parade? ‘Tis what the Maine Attorney General’s office found filed away, presumably next to the biscuits and a rather shocking collection of nicked information.

With all this hullabaloo, the bank’s security ninjas have unsheathed their magnifying glasses and are ferreting about for clues—though not before inviting local police to join in this banky game of Cluedo. Will they find the culprit? Or will it be like that time granddad blamed the dog for the missing sausage?

As penance, TD Bank (America’s 10th biggest, imagine that—$372.8 billion in biscuits) is handing out a two-year pass to an identity protection club for every customer nabbed. Let’s hope it comes with a free whoopee cushion and a chocolate bar. 🍫🔍

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2025-05-09 12:30