You Won’t Believe Who Got Away With a $2 Billion Crypto Hack—And Why

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If you ever wondered why your grandma warned you not to put all your eggs in one giant, unregulated digital basket, the latest escapade of WazirX and its cofounder, Nischal Shetty, may clarify things. Picture this: It’s July 2024, and while most of us are figuring out how to stream yet another gritty reboot, someone’s out there conducting a Rs 2000 crore cyber heist with all the subtlety of a raccoon in your kitchen at midnight. 🦝💸

The petitioners—who I picture sitting in a room with stacks of paperwork and more caffeine than sense—pointed their fingers not just at WazirX, but at Binance and Liminal Custody, too, blaming them for Rs 4500 crore in missing cryptocurrencies. That’s more zeroes than I can comfortably read without getting a nosebleed.

Meanwhile, over 4.4 million Indian users are stuck watching their funds on WazirX like it’s a reality show nobody asked to be part of—for ten months! That’s nearly enough time to learn a new language, or at least perfect the art of passive-aggressive tweeting. 🤷‍♂️

And what did the Supreme Court say? In their infinite wisdom, they decided India’s crypto regulations are about as clear as my Aunt Gloria’s explanations at family dinners—vague, convoluted, and guaranteed to leave you more confused than when you started. So, case dismissed. Court adjourned. Insert dramatic gavel sound here. ⚖️

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2025-04-16 11:06