Ah, March! The month where the sun shines, allergies kick in, and altcoins get their moment in the limelight after February’s melodrama. Grab your popcorn because we’re about to dive into some serious crypto theater, featuring towering gains and gut-wrenching losses. 🍿
Our friends over at BeInCrypto have graciously pointed out three altcoins that are apparently worth keeping an eye on. But let’s be real: they’re probably just baiting us into another round of crypto gambling. 🎲
Ethereum (ETH)
Ethereum decided it was time to strut its stuff, jumping a good 13% on Monday. Now it’s wobbling at $2,349, feeling like the drunk relative at a wedding. It did manage to dance over a downtrend support line, though, which is kind of like avoiding the dance floor so you don’t embarrass yourself.
The much-anticipated Pectra upgrade on March 5 is supposed to make the network more efficient. We’ve heard that before, haven’t we? Let’s see if it can jack ETH up to $2,654 or if it trips on its own shoelaces and tumbles down to $2,170 instead—à la the classic cryptocurrency rollercoaster. 🤪
If Ethereum manages to cling to support, we might have a winner. But should it slip below $2,344, well, let’s not open that can of worms. It’ll be like watching a slow-motion car crash. 🥴
Onyxcoin (XCN)
Next up, we’ve got the illustrious Onyxcoin, which is launching a beacon of hope—the Goliath Mainnet—today! You know, in case you were wondering if this altcoin was still relevant. It’s already up 32% over three days, and at this rate, it’s acting like it just won the lottery!
Currently trading at $0.0188, XCN is attempting to put down roots at $0.0182 like an overzealous plant parent. If it holds that ground, we might just see it blooming towards $0.0237. 🌼 But if you see it diving back to $0.0150, well, let’s just say it’s officially hit rock bottom. Can you say “major buzzkill”? 😬
It’s a candle-lit dinner followed by an awkward silence if it doesn’t manage to hold those gains. Talk about a rollercoaster in a rickety old theme park! 🎢
Portal (PORTAL)
Finally, we arrive at Portal—a cryptocurrency that may or may not have been named after a video game. For the past month, it’s been hanging around below $0.151 like that friend who just won’t leave the party. Currently at $0.131, it’s gearing up for the Portal Bridge upgrade on March 4. Where is this bridge going, you ask? Who knows! But let’s hope it’s not leading to disappointment. 🙈
With all the excitement, the new Solana bridge function could either launch this coin into the stratosphere or send it packing back to the basement of crypto! If it can break through $0.151, it might just be the talk of the town! 🥳
However, if this altcoin fails to break free, it might as well start knitting a sweater and settle into that cozy consolidation phase for a while longer. Yikes! 😱
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2025-03-03 16:44