This madness follows the 2022 crypto law, which was basically a half-baked idea that needed four public consultations (read: a game show where people voted for their favorite rules). Now, in 2026 (which is basically next Tuesday if time is a flat circle), we’ll get to see these genius regulations in action. 🚨
According to the Financial Times, Sethi’s not just blowing smoke. He claims the U.K’s cautious approach to crypto is like putting a speed bump on a highway-it slows everyone down. 🛣️🚧 The pop-ups on crypto websites, he says, are as cheerful as a dwarf with a hangover, warning users they’re about to “die” if they proceed. 💀💻
The hottest of whispers amidst the high-tech haunts is that a singularly cunning entity, employing the clever sleight of an extra-ordinary 14,000 cyber connections, has absconded with over 60% of aPriori’s airdrop-a feat akin to a Gallagher Brothers act in a windstorm, dazzling, yet improbable.
The blockchain wizards at Polygon and Anq, with their heads stuffed full of ideas and their pockets jingling with digital dreams, recently had a chinwag with a rather important chap in New Delhi. Sanjeev Sanyal, a bigwig on Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s Economic Advisory Council, lent them his ear. Their natter? Tokenization and government-backed stablecoins, of course! India’s dipping its toes into the digital finance puddle, and it’s making quite the splash. 🌊💼
According to the Ministry of Finance and Dubai Finance (departments with names so ambitious they might as well be filing their own CBDCs), this was a test run using the mBridge platform. A name that, if spoken in a desert wind, might cause camels to weep with nostalgia for the bygone era of sand and silver.
The community, ever cheerful and optimistic, thought it was a bull parade, while a few skeptics merely shrugged and yawned. Broader trends? Just your typical bullish excitement wrapped in a shiny package. 🥳
Rumor has it, the ticker-brace yourselves-will be XRPC, because who doesn’t love some punk rock in finance? Once Nasdaq gives the thumbs-up and the waiting game plays out, expect the trading floor to go nuts. So far, the earnestly optimistic are eyeing a miracle date of November 13. But hey, with SEC and Nasdaq’s mood swings, don’t hold your breath-unless you like to meditate in line.
The incident in question involves the theft of 127,272 BTC from the LuBian Bitcoin mining pool in December 2020, a heist so colossal it could make a pirate weep. The Chinese National Computer Virus Emergency Response Center, ever the drama queens of the cyber world, suggests this was no mere criminal act but a “state-level hacker operation” orchestrated by the US. One can only imagine the US government’s response: “Oh, you mean that operation? We thought it was a prank!”
The coin, that beloved jester, broke under $0.1720 amid frantic volume-a full-blown sell-off during U.S. hours, testing the patience (or the stupidity) of long-term believers. Will it bounce back, or is this the end? Only the market knows, and it’s just laughing behind its hand. 🎭
Yes, behind the scenes, the cogs of crypto destiny are grinding away with all the efficiency of Jeeves polishing Bertie’s spats. Supply is vanishing faster than the caviar at a Lord’s cricket match, on-chain activity is fizzing like a shaken martini, and Ripple, bless its ledger-lined heart, is suddenly the talk of every hedge-fund chap between Park Avenue and Piccadilly.
