Of seven solana (SOL) ETFs, the pack has siphoned $618.62 million since their debut, now commanding 1.15% of solana’s market valuation-a feast for the hungry. Meanwhile, XRP, with four ETFs, has drawn $874.28 million, a rival in the shadows. The Canary-run XRPC ETF, a lion in the grass, has gobbled $357 million, while Grayscale’s GXRP roars with $50.27 million in yesterday’s feast.
Another bitcoin-focused DAT has topped up its holdings, as the Nasdaq-listed American Bitcoin (ABTC) revealed on social media that its reserves now stand at 4,367 BTC – about $404 million based on exchange rates on Dec. 4, 2025. One might say, “How poetic! While the stock flounders, the coins multiply like a Dostoevskian fever dream.” 🧠💥
Imaginez la scène : le vieux lion Schwab, tout d’un coup, ouvre grand les yeux et dit : « Pourquoi pas une petite acquisition crypto ? » Ah, la douce folie de la finance classique qui lorgne vers la toile numérique. Et pendant ce temps, Binance, le géant à la coqueluche, nomme Yi He comme co-CEO, comme si la reine d’Angleterre décidait de partager sa couronne avec une domestique. On est à deux doigts du spectacle ! 👑🤹♂️
Behold, the union of traditional finance and digital chaos! They claim it’s to “bridge” the gap, but really, it’s just a fancy way of saying, “Let’s monetize each other’s chaos!” 🤝💸
On November 7, 2025, the Securities and Exchange Commission bore witness to a transaction that, in the annals of financial history, may one day be cited as a moment of quiet introspection. Frisch Financial, having held 180,506 shares of QQQE by quarter’s end, reduced its stake by nearly a quarter, leaving the position valued at $18.34 million. This was no mere arithmetic adjustment but a statement-a recalibration of faith in the equal-weighted doctrine amid the tempest of market forces. The price of QQQE, $101.08 on that date, bore the faint scars of a year’s labor, rising 8.12% yet trailing the S&P 500 by 3.88 percentage points, a subtle rebuke to the egalitarian ideals of its construction.
Lo, Solana strives to transform $140 from foe to friend, yet the $144 summit remains a stubborn wall, tested thrice in a month! Since mid-November, this coin hath danced betwixt $120 and $144, a waltz of weakness amidst tempestuous tides. A mere mortal would weep at such indecision.
Abu Dhabi-focused Solana infrastructure firm Solmate (SLMT) has signed a non-binding term sheet to acquire digital asset firm RockawayX in an all-stock deal that would create an institutional crypto group with more than $2 billion in assets and third-party stake. Because why not? 🤝
The Big Switcheroo
The Bitcoin-centric phantasmagoria known as Twenty One Capital marches toward its NYSE listing like a drunken sailor toward a bar, ticker “XXI” affixed to its forehead. The merger with Cantor Equity Partners (CEP), a SPAC of dubious repute, shall conclude Dec. 8, pending the usual bureaucratic incantations.
XRP ($XRP), that spectral wraith of the crypto cosmos, has returned to the spotlight, where traders perform a frenzied tango of speculation: Will it soar to $3 or collapse into the $1.20 abyss? 🕺💃