This, my dear reader, is no mere administrative trifle. It is a seismic shift in the way the ravenous tech behemoths-AI and Bitcoin miners-siphon the lifeblood of America’s power grid. As these titans of industry vie for the dwindling nectar of electricity, the demand surges with a ferocity unseen since the last great energy crisis. Or perhaps since the last time I tried to charge my electric toothbrush during a heatwave. 🔌
This peculiar assertion emerged amidst the backdrop of a presidential pardon, a gesture that, one might say, danced on the edge of judicial absurdity. The White House, ever the stage for such performances, declared it a constitutional ritual, a nod to the turbulent era of crypto regulation under the previous administration. 🎭
Now, according to the SEC’s filings, Gleason Group upped its stake in the Vanguard STAR Funds-specifically, the Vanguard Total International Stock ETF (VXUS +0.32%)-by that same 97,690 shares during Q3 2025. The trade, as they say, was a whopper, valued at $6.93 million. The fund now holds 1,216,619 shares, worth a cool $89.37 million. One might say they’ve gone all-in on the global game, though I’d wager they’re not betting on the lottery.
The path ahead, however, was not paved with roses but with thorns of regulation. Twelve to eighteen months of scrutiny lie in wait, a trial by fire to prove if this crypto titan meets the OCC’s sacred standards. Would they emerge victorious, or would their dreams be devoured by red tape and sleepless nights? Only time, that merciless judge, would decide.
In what could be described as the silver lining to the world’s largest and most confusing financial thunderstorm, the $19 billion liquidation event is being spun as a “buying opportunity” by optimists (the ones who still believe in fairytales, apparently). This could theoretically set Bitcoin (BTC) on a path to a delightful $200,000 by the end of 2025, according to Standard Chartered’s global head of digital assets research, Geoff Kendrick.
At midday UTC on Oct. 24, trading went bonkers, with volume spiking to 74.39 million-350% above average-pushing XLM to $0.3229. It’s like the token hit the espresso machine and said, “Let’s do this!” ☕️ But then it hit resistance at $0.3230, because even crypto needs a nap. 😴 Support held at $0.3150, keeping the day’s drama to a 4.2% volatility range. 🎢
The regulated derivatives market for XRP is growing up and getting serious-and the implications could make XRP and the market’s top altcoins get ready for a massive surge. Hold onto your hats, folks. 🚀
DuPont Capital, that spectral hand in the financial poker game, trimmed its Union Pacific position by 11,943 shares in the third quarter of 2025. The estimated value of the trade? Approximately $2.69 million. After this act of fiscal alchemy, the fund clung to 36,048 shares, worth $8.52 million, as of September 30, 2025. The math checks out-but the motives? They’re buried under layers of caffeine-fueled speculation and the faint scent of paranoia.
So, what happened? You ask. Well, about two months ago, this majestic work of art mysteriously disappeared. Rumor has it that it was tossed into the cold waters of Lake Ceresio, as though someone thought throwing it into the lake would somehow erase the entire Bitcoin revolution. Spoiler alert: it didn’t. 💧
If your heart hasn’t been yanked out twice weekly by this crypto circus, are you truly alive? Or merely a spectator?
