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According to the parchment filed with the Watchful Eye of Ankh-Morpork², our protagonists increased their AESI holdings during the quarter ending September 30, 2025. The position now glows with a valuation of $8,253,631, which the fund’s scribes describe as “normal trading activity.” This phrase, much like “weather patterns are interesting,” typically means “we’re either geniuses or doomed, but let’s see what the quants say.”

This new position, now 2.2462% of Resolution’s 13F reportable assets, is less a strategy than a submission. The top five holdings-WELL, DLR, EQIX, VTR, EXR-loom like statues in a corridor, their percentages etched in cold numbers. As of November 13, 2025, HR shares traded at $18.08, a 9.91% ascent over a year, yet still lagging the S&P 500 by 2.48 percentage points. The figures are precise, yet they offer no clarity, only the weight of inevitability.

The stock, having pirouetted downward with a 65% loss over the past decade, now faces a breakup as imaginative as a vicar’s excuse for missing Sunday service. Management proposes dividing the firm into North American Grocery Co (custodian of Oscar Mayer’s wares) and Global Taste Elevation Co (keeper of Heinz’s ketchup kingdom). Mr. Buffett, ever the candid chap, has dismissed this maneuver as “about as useful as a screen door on a submarine,” which one must admit cuts sharper than a Ginsu knife.

In this landscape of shifting fortunes, it was the names tied to artificial intelligence and the broader tech tapestry that bore the weight of today’s gains. The strength of Oracle (ORCL +6.63%) and Micron Technology (MU +6.89%) lifted spirits, even as consumer stocks faltered beneath the weight of underwhelming earnings. Nike (NKE -10.54%) and Lamb Weston (LW -25.94%), once paraded as champions of retail, stumbled due to disappointing forecasts, casting a shadow over the shelves of retail and staples alike.

According to financial documents, Serenity has now amassed 5 million shares of Kanzhun, which, in their twisted little world, is valued at $117.6 million. This represents nearly 30% of Serenity’s total assets under management, a number that hovers around $394 million. An impressive feat, if one is a fan of high-risk wagers.

The SEC filing from November 13 reveals Serenity Capital’s latest crime: inflating their HTHT stake by 710,431 shares. Their total holding now sits at $49.8 million, which is 12.6% of the fund’s AUM. This isn’t just a purchase-it’s a declaration of war against the universe’s indifference to their portfolio’s order. The fund’s top holdings now read like a spreadsheet written by someone who refuses to alphabetize their groceries: BZ ($117.6M), ZTO ($97.1M), TAL ($53M), HTHT ($49.8M), and EDU ($34.9M). Neat, but why EDU? Did they misread a memo?

On November 13, Singapore-based Serenity Capital Management acquired 411,380 shares of New Oriental Education & Technology Group during the third quarter. The total holding now stands at 656,878 shares, valued at $34.9 million as of September 30. This makes New Oriental the fund’s fifth-largest position among eight reported holdings.