Our hero XRP, that dapper altcoin with delusions of grandeur, has thrown the crypto crowd into a tizzy. Arthur, the Sherlock Holmes of BingX, claims investors are behaving like cats and dogs in a thunderstorm-one moment sniffing roses, the next gnawing on furniture. 🐾
This isn’t just a small snack; oh no, it’s a banquet! As of December 7, 2025, Strategy, the digital conquistador, boasts a staggering hoard of 660,624 BTC, amassed for a total tidy sum of approximately $49.35 billion – yes, billion with a B – at an average venture cost of $74,696 a coin. It’s basically the Monopoly board come to life, with Strategy owning Mayfair and Park Lane at the same time. 🏦😏
Behold, the On-Chain Gas Futures Proposal-a magical contraption designed to make Ethereum transaction fees as predictable as a Roald Dahl plot twist! High-volume users and enterprises, rejoice! You can now lock in gas prices ahead of time, no more nasty surprises! 🎉
The fund increased its stake in Flowserve, bringing total shares to 7.5 million. The value of this holding reached $397.5 million by quarter-end. So it goes.
In a move that’d make even Warren Buffett raise an eyebrow, RPD filed with the SEC to reveal their new stash of ZoomInfo shares. Total holdings? A cool 6.9 million, valued at $75.3 million as of September 30. That’s like buying a sinking ship’s life preservers… and then buying more life preservers. [Winks at audience]
In the third quarter, HGI sold every last share of KRG, a gesture as final as a closing door. The sum-$3.4 million, measured by quarterly averages-was not a whisper but a shout. This departure arrives as the fund shrinks its herds of U.S. equities, retreating to safer pastures. The market, that great and indifferent force, watches with its thousand eyes.
The margins of high finance, like the margins of a fading painting, are filled with quiet disintegration. HGI’s retreat from Vornado-once a titan clasping the skyline-was nothing less than a symbolic shedding of old skin. With a quarter revealing a halving of their assets, one cannot help but consider whether the firm finally perceives the ghost of a rapidly diminishing landscape. A landscape where the familiar, stubborn edifices of Manhattan are bathed in a wan light of waning vitality, where even the most robust structures seem poised for quiet surrender.
In the manner of a painter retreating from a half-finished canvas, HGI Capital Management divested its entire position in Empire State Realty Trust. The sum of $4 million, extracted from a portfolio of $36.4 million, marked the end of a chapter in which the fund had once held 5.4% of its assets in this venerable REIT. The SEC, ever the patient scribe, bore witness to this departure on November 14.
CoinShares reports crypto ETPs gobbled up $716 million last week, building on last week’s $1 billion feast. Because nothing says “I’m stable” like a 2-week streak of gains after a dramatic exit. 🧠
Our hero, BTC, rebounds from the abyss of $83,000 with the grace of a ballerina in a dumpster fire-bruised but unbowed. The $92,000 mark looms, a siren song for bulls and a tripwire for bears. Momentum indicators hum a tentative lullaby, while volatility, that fickle muse, curls up for a nap. Will this be a phoenix’s rebirth or a pratfall into the arms of Mr. Market’s tender embrace? 🤷♂️
