Chrome’s Crypto Wallet Scandal: Stealing Seed Phrases!
Lo, the extension, named “Safery: Ethereum Wallet,” doth boast of being “reliable and secure,” yet in truth, it is a sly fox in sheep’s clothing, its intentions as murky as a swamp at dusk. 🧠
Bitfarms Dips 18% as It Shutters Bitcoin Mining for AI-What Could Go Wrong?
On Thursday, Bitfarms announced that its 18-megawatt Bitcoin mining site in the lovely state of Washington would be the first to undergo this dramatic transformation. The new AI and HPC (high-performance computing) venture is expected to be completed by December 2026. Apparently, the company’s very small Washington site (less than 1% of its total portfolio) will be the golden goose that keeps them afloat. Because, of course, transitioning from cryptocurrency to AI is the “best opportunity” for any Bitcoin miner. Who wouldn’t want to throw away all that lovely crypto mining revenue in favor of more “advanced” data centers?
LINK Whales Flee Binance-But Why? 🐋🚀
Taker-buy dominance-a phrase as elegant as a tax form-and a 70% long ratio suggest traders are positioning for upside with the subtlety of a bull in a china shop.
OKX’s DEX Gambit: Trading Freedom or Digital Chains? 🤔
In a press release that somehow escaped the censors-sorry, was forwarded to crypto.news on Nov. 13-OKX proudly unveiled its latest innovation: letting users trade decentralized tokens without the usual circus of third-party wallets, bridges, or existential dread. “Seamless access to decentralized liquidity,” they call it. We’ll see how seamless it is when the gas fees hit.
XRP ETF’s Debut: A Financial Farce Matched Even Solana! 🐔💸
The strong debut suggests significant investor appetite for regulated XRP exposure, with the ETF moving 2.26 million shares and experiencing 11% intraday volatility as markets discovered the price-like a drunkard fumbling for a key. 🔑😅
Hedge Fund Whale Nudges Consumer Stock
On November 13, 2025, the SEC filed a report revealing Appaloosa LP had added 5,233,908 shares of Whirlpool Corporation (WHR) during Q3. The total position now clocks in at $432.30 million, making Whirlpool the fund’s third-largest holding. For context, that’s roughly the amount I spent on my last vacation-minus the part where I actually went anywhere.
Ether’s Future: 4 Things That Could Make or Break Its Bullish Comeback in 2025
Lower network fees and declining blockchain usage continue to drag down ETH’s performance, even though Ethereum is king in institutional dominance.
VOO vs. QQQ: Tech Thrills or S&P Chills? A High-Stakes ETF Face-Off 🎢
VOO’s expense ratio is so low, it’s basically a coupon for 10% off at Bed, Bath & Beyond. Meanwhile, QQQ charges more than your gym membership-but promises returns that’ll make your head spin faster than a NASDAQ ticker board.
Your Advocates Sells $19.6M in BOND Shares
The sale reduced BOND’s presence in the fund’s portfolio from 7.5% of reportable assets under management to a mere 0.4%, a diminution as stark as the fading light of a waning star. The top holdings that followed bore the weight of their own histories, each a testament to the capriciousness of markets: DCOR, DFIC, UDFEM, FAS, and SPIB, their values etched in percentages that spoke of both triumph and trepidation.