And lo, the stock market hath taken notice, for over five years, the shares have ascended with the fervor of a lover’s oath, climbing nearly 150%. Yet, fear not, for the stage is still set for new entrants. Behold, three acts of this grand dividend drama:
The Fed, that grand bureaucracy of digits and decrees, has scheduled its October séance to conclude on the 29th. Investors, those modern-day pilgrims, will gather to witness the sacred scroll of interest rates, their fortunes hinging on whether the Fed’s quill dips in red ink or green. But let us not mistake ceremony for clarity; this is theater, not prophecy.
What’s changed? A motorcycle. A Ducati, no less. QuantumScape strapped its solid-state batteries to a partner’s bike and revved the engine. The stock? It jumped like a junkie finding one last fix. But let’s not confuse a demo for a miracle. The road ahead is paved with potholes and promises.
Now, Glassnode, those wise old owls of market research, reckon this deleveraging was just what the doctor ordered-a necessary reset, they say. A reset, mind you, that left investors nursing their wounds and counting their losses. But hey, what’s a little financial bloodletting among friends? 🩸💰
On Monday, the ever-determined Bank of England Governor and FSB Chairman, Andrew Bailey, declared, with all the gravitas of a man whose title suggests he must know something important, that the global watchdog would step up its efforts to confront the increasingly menacing dangers from the private finance sector and, of course, stablecoins. We get it, Andrew. Stablecoins, the darling of digital finance, but also the inconvenient truth that cannot be ignored. They’re growing, they’re everywhere, and apparently, they could cause a bit of a ruckus. Bailey, in a letter to the Group of 20 (G20), promised a reformation of the FSB’s surveillance system. Why? Because apparently, the current one is like using a telescope to watch your neighbor’s Wi-Fi signal-too slow, too outdated, and not really effective in spotting emerging threats.
According to the ever-optimistic Tom Lee, ETH might just rocket to $10K-$12K by year’s end, turning paupers into princes-though the options traders, those gloomy wizards of the derivatives tower, seem to be betting on a more… realistic potion of pessimism. 🧙♂️
Despite this dramatic interlude, Bitcoin’s market-value-to-realized-value (MVRV) ratio-a metric so arcane it could only have been devised by a mind steeped in the mysteries of high finance-continues to suggest a “mid-cycle expansion.” Translated from the jargon, this means the market is neither in the throes of euphoria nor the depths of despair. How utterly tedious.
Once a titan with its market-to-Bitcoin NAV (mNAV) strutting above the big 1, it’s now reduced to the droll 0.99, stumbling into uncharted waters-imagine sailing the high seas only to find you’ve hit a shallow patch. According to the wise men with charts (and official data, no less), this was first recorded on an unremarkable Tuesday-something to toast with a cup of tea, or perhaps something more spirited. ☕🥃
But let us not be blinded by the glittering statistics. For Nebius is more than just a player in the cloud game. The company’s vast portfolio of AI-based ventures-each a moving cog in an intricate machinery-includes Avride, its autonomous vehicle division. Yet, it is the 28% stake in a smaller but equally ambitious company, ClickHouse, that offers a hint of the company’s future. ClickHouse, an AI startup readying itself for the public offering of a lifetime, is a venture that may yet shape the destiny of Nebius and its shareholders alike.
Here are 4 altcoins analysts believe are poised to break through in the coming week: USELESS, Mantle, Ethereum, and Bitcoin Hyper. Hold onto your wallets, folks. It’s going to be a wild ride! 💥
