The earnings report, shall we say, lacked the effervescence of a well-shaken cocktail. Guidance met expectations, which, in the world of high finance, is akin to receiving a slightly used postage stamp. The stock, having doubled since late November – a feat worthy of a carnival magician – found itself decidedly downcast. Still, one suspects opportunity lurks within, like a hidden compartment in a bureau.
I’ve been watching these markets long enough to know that easy money usually has a hidden cost. This fund, KBWY, is no exception. It’s a gamble, dressed up in the respectable clothing of an ETF.
Amazon. Started with books. BOOKS! Can you believe it? Now it’s a logistical nightmare, a sprawling empire of cardboard and overnight delivery. E-commerce is the engine, sure, churning out $177 billion in the last quarter. But the REAL story is Amazon Web Services (AWS). $35.5 billion in revenue, a 23.6% jump. They’re hooking everyone up to the cloud, selling access to the digital ether. And they’re not afraid to spend. $200 billion on AI infrastructure this year? That’s not investment, that’s a declaration of war. Deals with OpenAI, Visa, United Airlines… the list goes on. They’re building a digital fortress, and frankly, it’s terrifying. It’s also… smart. A cold, calculating, algorithmic smart, but smart nonetheless.
So, Tesla’s already on its third generation of this robot. Generation three! That’s like, the iPhone 8 of humanoid robots. They’re claiming it’s “designed for mass production.” Which is corporate-speak for, “we haven’t quite figured it out yet, but we’re pretending we have.” They’re putting these things in their factories, not to do anything useful yet, but to “learn.” It’s like sending a freshman intern to run the board meeting. Sure, they’ll learn…mostly what not to do. And they’re leveraging xAI, Elon’s other company, for the brains of the operation. Because nothing says “safe AI development” like a guy who tweets memes all day. But seriously, Tesla’s good at integrating software and hardware. It’s kind of their whole thing. So, they might actually pull this off.
As we speak (or as I type), RaveDAO [RAVE] is doing its best impression of a roller coaster, surging over 29% and landing itself among the top three biggest gainers in the grand circus that is the cryptocurrency world. At this rate, it’s practically throwing confetti with its weekly gains now soaring above a staggering 45%!
One wonders, of course, if the market has finally begun to appreciate the subtle shifts occurring in the landscape of finance. The old ways—the ponderous institutions, the tangled webs of fees—are yielding, slowly, to a new order. Remitly, a mobile remittance platform, represents a part of this change.
The last quarterly report was, shall we say, less than stellar. Revenue dipped by a respectable 15.4% year-over-year, while Adjusted Funds From Operations—the metric REITs cling to like life rafts2—sank by 23%. Analysts, those oracles of moderate accuracy, are predicting a similarly gloomy picture for the current quarter, with revenue expected to fall further and earnings remaining…flat. A modest beat of expectations might offer a temporary reprieve, a brief illusion of recovery. But that’s rather like polishing a particularly tarnished gnome—it might look better, but it’s still a gnome.
These smaller altcoins, naturally, fared worse than the “blue chips” – Bitcoin and Ethereum. It’s always the little guys who get squeezed first. But here’s the thing: just because something’s down doesn’t mean it’s out. I’m looking at Solana and Cardano as potential buys before the inevitable “crypto winter is over!” headlines start popping up. Because, let’s be real, there’s always a spring training for crypto.
Solel Partners, these big money people, trimmed their Brightstar stake by 624,800 shares. Six hundred and twenty-four thousand. It’s a number. A big one. They still have some, $43.27 million worth, but they decided that was…enough. Or too much. Who knows? The whole thing is just…opaque. It’s like they’re deliberately trying to make it confusing. And of course, the stock is down 26% over the year. Because, naturally.
I’m not saying Nvidia is a bad investment. It’s just… predictable. Like ordering the chicken at a wedding. Safe. And when everyone’s doing the same thing, the real opportunity tends to hide in plain sight. So, I’ve been poking around, and two companies have caught my eye. They’re both reporting on the 26th, and if I’m being honest, I have a slightly irrational fondness for underdogs. It probably stems from being the youngest of five siblings.