The cryptocurrency market has been wilder than a dust storm in Oklahoma, with leading assets getting trampled in the selloff stampede. Bitcoin
BTC
$103,012
24h volatility: 1.2%
Market cap: $2.05 T
Vol. 24h: $60.85 B
took a 16.7% nosedive in the last 30 days, while Ethereum
ETH
$3,387
24h volatility: 2.7%
Market cap: $408.87 B
Vol. 24h: $34.00 B
got bucked off the saddle even harder, losing 28% of its value. Talk about a rough ride. 🤠💨
The esteemed Institute of Technology and Renewable Energies (ITER), under the watchful eye of the Tenerife Island Council, acquired these digital coins over a decade past, not for the purpose of enrichment, but to study blockchain, that curious amalgam of mathematics and modernity. Now, as per the esteemed El Día, the council is finalizing plans to divest these holdings, much to the chagrin of any who might have invested in a less… whimsical venture.
For the three months ending on September 30, Robinhood’s total revenue hit $1.27 billion-yes, you read that right-double what they reported this time last year. Talk about a glow-up! 💰 And guess what? That beat the analysts’ oh-so-modest estimate of $1.2 billion. Oops, sorry, Wall Street. 🙃
The funds? A threefold assault on prudence: buying more BTC, repurchasing shares (for the soul?), and dabbling in Bitcoin options trading. A masterclass in “borrow now, cry later.” The company’s 30,823 BTC stash, worth $3.51 billion, is so vast it could flood a small country-or at least a particularly greedy hedge fund.
Image remains where it is
But don’t let that quiet exterior fool you. Beneath the surface, a seismic shift is brewing – the retail traders are retreating, but the whales? Oh, they’re still here, sitting on their massive piles of Pi, gently pushing the price up like a concerned parent holding up their wobbly child on their first day of school.
That’s not a mere coincidence. As SHIB touched this floor once again, buyers piled in, prompting a sharp 11.5% surge in trading volume that signaled fresh accumulation. Throw in a slight recovery in the overall crypto market cap, up just under 2%, and the stage felt set for SHIB to snap out of its brutal downtrend. For now, traders are debating, does this floor holds strong like before, or is more pain ahead? 🤯
Bitcoin’s relief rally just injected fresh energy into a choppy market. $BTC briefly reclaimed $104K in a brisk squeeze, reigniting risk appetite after weeks of chop, causing a $50B market pump. 🧨 (Chop, indeed. A market that’s more unpredictable than a toddler on a sugar rush.)
The quantum threat is more than a technical hurdle. It has a profound impact on digital assets and threatens the privacy of individuals relying on Bitcoin for financial freedom. A profound impact, indeed! It’s not just a technical hurdle-it’s a full-blown circus act, complete with a ringmaster named Quantum and a troupe of qubits. 🎪
So, what’s going on with Solana? It’s trying to pull itself together after a crypto market meltdown, currently hanging out around $150. But wait-there’s a glimmer of hope! It’s up 1.18% today, which, sure, isn’t exactly an all-time high, but it’s something, right? 🤷♀️
