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Intel’s divestiture of its 51% stake in Altera to Silver Lake for $3.3 billion marks a calculated step in CEO Lip-Bu Tan’s restructuring agenda. By deconsolidating Altera’s financials, the company anticipates a $16.8 billion adjusted operating cost forecast for 2024-a $0.2 billion reduction from prior guidance. While this maneuver improves balance sheet liquidity, it also raises questions about the long-term viability of relying on asset sales to mask underperformance in core segments.

So far in this peculiar year of 2025, Oklo’s stock has soared to an almost surreal elevation, an unsettling increase of 330%. Merriment and astonishment collide as one might attribute this newfound euphoria to none other than President Donald Trump, a name now whispered like some ominous incantation that held significance for propelling this once-aspirational entity to dizzying heights.

For all its grandeur, Roblox is a paradox wrapped in a promise. It is a seed planted in fertile soil, yet the rains of profitability have not come. The headlines sing of a next-generation platform, but the land is parched, and the crops are still green.

Musk argues that 80% of Tesla’s future value will come from a humanoid robot named Optimus. Imagine that: a machine that walks and talks, but also makes you a millionaire. He bought 2.57 million shares for about $1 billion. That’s a lot of money. Or as one might say, it’s less than the cost of a Mars colony.

And wouldn’t you know it, Citigroup gets the credit, bless their polished boots.

Alright, let’s take a deep breath here. Since Opendoor is basically tethered to the whims of the housing market-where buyers and sellers are just *waiting* for rates to come down-its stock moves in lockstep with any mention of a rate cut. So, if the Fed decides to cut rates by 25 basis points on Wednesday, as expected, well, that could help Opendoor. Or it could not. You know, it’s all speculation. Maybe the housing market will bounce, maybe it won’t. Who knows? Add in the quarterly “dot plot” projections, plus Chairman Powell’s inevitable public lecture on the state of the economy, and you’ve got yourself a stock market reaction. It’s all coming down to one simple thing: rate cuts. And here’s the kicker: in June, the Fed thought there’d be a 50 basis point cut this year. But, surprise, surprise, the labor market’s softened, so maybe that’s off the table now. But let’s just wait and see.

The stock, currently buoyed by 2.1%, wavers like a pawn in a cosmic game of backgammon between Wall Street and the Kremlin. Or perhaps it is the devil himself, penning this column, who chuckles at the spectacle.

Hold onto your hats, ladies and gentlemen, because Amazon’s net income wasn’t just a gentle incline; it rocketed from $13.5 billion in the second quarter of 2024 to a breathtaking $18.2 billion in Q2 2025. It’s as if they discovered an ancient scroll that contained the secrets of speed-in innovation and delivery! If only I had one for my morning coffee!