Now, I’ll admit I’ve never owned a single share of CRISPR. My own portfolio resembles a thrift store bin-lots of mystery, minimal value-but I do understand the agony of watching something you love underperform. Take CRISPR’s stock price: up 0.64% over the past year while the S&P 500 zoomed past it like a Tesla on Autopilot. It’s the financial equivalent of being left at the prom while your date goes home with a blockchain ETF.
That’s right, Transak USA LLC has secured a shiny set of MTLs in Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, and Vermont! 🌽🍁 Now, with a grand total of 11 states on its license list, this company is ready to make stablecoin payments as easy as swiping a credit card at a vending machine. Seriously, it’s that smooth. Transak made this big announcement on Nov. 11, 2025, and you better believe they’re celebrating in style. 😎
IVV cuts its fees to a sliver-0.03% versus SPY’s 0.09%. It’s the difference between a clean knife and a rusted blade. Both yield roughly the same dividends, but the cost is a slow bleed over time. For the long-haul investor, it’s a choice between a bullet and a needle.
Yahoo Finance will soon be graced with Polymarket’s live, real-time predictions. Yes, you’ll be able to wager on everything from politics to economics-and possibly your next vacation destination (if you’re feeling lucky). 🏖️
The total crypto market cap dropped by 2% to hover around $3.42 trillion at press time, a figure so modest it could fit in a teacup. BTC price slipped below $102k again after the bullish momentum failed to gain traction, much like a man in a bowler hat trying to outrun a charging rhino. 🐃🎩
Both funds, like two gentlemen at a garden party, offer broad exposure to the U.S. consumer staples sector-a realm of companies that peddle essentials from toothpaste to tinned tomatoes. The question is not whether they serve the same tea, but rather which teacup one prefers to sip from. Shall we inspect the china? 🫖
On a random Tuesday (because why not?), Schwartz took to X (formerly Twitter, but let’s not get into that) to school us all. Someone asked, “Why spend Bitcoin if it’s gonna moon later?” And he was like, “Girl, because people are living in the now, not just HODLing for the apocalypse.” 🌙 Basically, using Bitcoin today is like saying, “I trust this more than my ex’s promises.” 💸
But hey, fundamentals are holding up like a good push-up bra. Sentiment’s neutral, ETFs are chugging along, and institutions are here for the long haul. Long-term holders are buying like it’s Black Friday, while short-term traders are ghosting. 👻 Funding rates? As neutral as Switzerland. 🇨🇭
Imagine a musical theater where the lead character (Krane) suddenly triples their bet on a song’s final note. That’s our story. In Q3, Krane’s TME stake ballooned to 19 million shares, now worth $421.6 million. If stocks were opera, this would be the aria before the encore.
According to a secretive parchment-the SEC filing-Siligmueller’s team of financial conspirators had thoroughly cleansed their holdings of the ETF. They sold more than 98,247 shares, an amount that roughly equates to a bag of money sitting in a darkened room-about $8.87 million-based on the quarter’s average price. Once the pride of their holdings, the ETF’s once-loyal 3.4% slice of their asset pie shrank into a ghostly zero come late September. The whole edifice of their faith in this fund had crumbled so completely, it’s now less visible than a mouse in a sugar jar.