As a dividend hunter, I’m less concerned with saving the planet and more concerned with saving my portfolio. And Beyond Meat? It’s not exactly raining dividend checks. It’s more like a steady drizzle of red ink. The company built its whole business on the idea that everyone would suddenly ditch burgers for…well, for something that tried to be a burger. It’s a bold strategy, Cotton, let’s see if it pays off. Spoiler alert: it hasn’t.
The question, as it always is, is not simply what to buy, but how. To hold the beast itself, or to partake of its reflection in a polished, institutional mirror? A choice, one suspects, that reveals more about the investor than any spreadsheet ever could.
Should one find oneself without ownership of shares in these entities, the acquisition thereof may prove… expedient. Not because of inherent value, but because the prevailing currents of speculation dictate that such actions are, at present, less disadvantageous than others.
Technological currents, naturally, contribute to this buoyancy – the shimmering mirage of artificial intelligence, the whispered promises of quantum computing. But to attribute the entire spectacle to silicon and algorithms would be… reductive. The Federal Reserve’s carefully calibrated easing of rates, a subtle loosening of the monetary reins, plays a role equally, if not more, significant. A gentle nudge, a whispered encouragement to the bulls.
A Most Telling Statistic
Now, Novo Nordisk proposes a course correction, a strategic recalibration anchored, in part, to the advent of an oral formulation of Wegovy. Approved late last year and recently launched, this iteration is presented not as a replacement for the established injectable, but as an expansion of reach—a calculated maneuver to encompass those repelled by the needle, burdened by the exigencies of cold-chain storage, or simply deterred by the visible mark of intervention. It is a broadening of the net, a tacit acknowledgment that the path to widespread adoption is paved with convenience, and, let us not forget, a more palatable price point for those operating outside the shelter of comprehensive insurance.
This has resulted, rather predictably, in valuations reaching levels that are, shall we say, historically noteworthy. We’re talking about the Shiller P/E ratio, or, as the more learned chaps call it, the Cyclically Adjusted P/E. A mouthful, what? But a useful measure nonetheless.
These figures, stark and precise, tell only a fraction of the story. The reported price on that January day – $74.69 – is merely an anchor point, a fleeting measurement in a constantly evolving landscape. The true weight of these shares lies not in their monetary value, but in the conviction they represent.
ASML, you see, doesn’t dabble in the flamboyant consumer-facing aspects of artificial intelligence. It doesn’t offer seductive interfaces or promise to liberate us from the tyranny of mundane tasks. No, ASML’s contribution is far more fundamental, more… geological. It manufactures the machines – exquisitely complex, astronomically expensive machines – that etch the very blueprints of intelligence onto silicon. Photolithography, the process it masters, is less about illumination and more about a controlled, almost surgical, removal of material. A subtractive art, if you will, yielding an additive benefit to the digital realm.
Now, we’re looking at three pipeline companies: Oneok (OKE +0.80%), Kinetik Holdings (KNTK +0.54%), and Williams (WMB +0.03%). They’re currently handing out dividends between 3% and 8%. The S&P 500? A measly 1.1%. That’s like comparing a king’s ransom to… well, a slightly used button. And they just raised their payouts. A trend, if you will. A beautiful, beautiful trend. It’s like watching a perfectly executed pratfall – you know it’s coming, and it’s still delightful.