So, Boeing. Boeing! You know, it’s just… the sheer audacity. They get a $4.2 billion contract, which, let’s be honest, is a number I can barely process, and then they deliver… this. This thing. They’re supposed to be getting people to space, not providing material for congressional hearings. It’s like ordering a steak and getting a… a partially assembled birdhouse.
Six years ago. Six years! They launched this Starliner, and it just… didn’t dock. Didn’t dock! It’s not like it was a complicated maneuver. It’s space, yes, but it’s not brain surgery. Then, two years later, it sort of docked, but with glitches. Glitches! Like a self-checkout machine at the grocery store. You think you’re done, and then it yells at you for an unexpected item in the bagging area. And now, after actually getting astronauts up there, they left them stranded. Stranded! On the International Space Station. For months. Months! They needed a SpaceX rescue. A rescue. It’s humiliating. It’s just… profoundly irritating.
And now, this 311-page report. 311 pages! Who reads 311 pages about a spaceship that can’t seem to get the basics right? Apparently, NASA did. And what did they find? Five failed thrusters, leaky seals, a propulsion system with the redundancy of a one-legged stool. It’s like they built it out of spare parts and good intentions. And the worst part? They almost had a “really terrible day.” A “really terrible day!” That’s what they’re calling potentially losing astronauts? It’s… understated. It’s offensively understated.
They classified it as a “Type A mishap.” A “mishap!” It’s a failed $4.2 billion mission! Call it what it is. And then they issue 61 recommendations. 61! It’s like a dentist giving you 61 things you need to fix in your mouth. You just want to walk away. But no, NASA isn’t canceling it. Of course not. They need “competition and redundancy.” Meaning they don’t want to be completely reliant on SpaceX. Which, fine. But the idea that Boeing, after all this, is still a viable competitor? It’s a delusion. A costly delusion. It’s like thinking your neighbor, who consistently crashes his car into mailboxes, is a qualified race car driver.
Starliner’s Reprieve
So, Jared Isaacman, the new NASA administrator, says they need competition. Competition! Like that justifies sending people up in a potentially faulty spacecraft. It’s a classic hostage situation. “We need to keep Boeing around so SpaceX doesn’t gouge us.” It’s just… it’s a terrible negotiating tactic. You’re rewarding failure. And the implication that SpaceX is going to suddenly jack up prices if they have a monopoly? As if they weren’t already charging enough. It’s a whole mess. A whole, expensive mess.
They’re not flying anyone else up on it until they “understand the technical causes.” “Understand the technical causes!” After 311 pages, they still need to understand the causes? It’s insulting. They might use it for cargo runs. Cargo! So, instead of people, they’re sending… space junk? It’s a demotion. A public shaming. And they’re still hinting that there’s a chance they’ll get all six of those original missions. Six missions! If the ISS stays up until 2032. Which, let’s be honest, is just delaying the inevitable. It’s like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.
Time’s Running Out
SpaceX has flown 13 missions. 13! Boeing has flown… well, they’ve flown a couple of test flights that required rescuing. It’s not a good look. At the current rate, with the ISS potentially retiring after 2030, there are only nine flights left. Nine! And Boeing needs six. It’s a numbers game, and they’re losing. Badly. Unless, of course, they extend the life of the ISS. Which, you know, solves nothing. It just prolongs the agony. It’s like giving someone a Band-Aid for a broken leg.
A billion dollars lost. That’s what they’re looking at. A billion dollars. It’s not nothing. It’s a lot of money. Boeing is a big company, sure, but even big companies don’t like losing money. And the real loss? The reputation. The idea that Boeing, a company that used to build rockets that actually worked, is now… this. It’s just… disappointing. Profoundly disappointing. And frankly, it’s a little bit infuriating.
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2026-03-14 12:14