And let’s talk about that ETF demand-or should I say, the lack thereof. It’s drier than a Liz Lemon burn. 🔥 ETF data says, “Nope, not interested,” and both crypto bros and traditional finance folks are like, “Hard pass.” 🚫
Meanwhile, Dogecoin (DOGE), the meme coin that refuses to die, is looking a bit wobbly. 😵 After repeatedly banging its head against the $0.133 resistance wall, it’s now slinking back toward the $0.13 zone. The question on everyone’s mind: Can the bulls hold the line, or will the bears drag DOGE down to $0.125? Spoiler alert: nobody knows, but we’re all here for the drama. 🍿
He’s observed a rather alarming drop in the buy/sell pressure delta. Which, put simply, means far more people are shouting “SELL!” than “BUY!”. Which, shockingly, is what happens when people want to sell. It’s all very scientific, you know. Apparently, market orders are the ones actually doing anything, not those passive-aggressive limit orders just sitting there silently judging everyone.
This is no alchemy. Annaly’s mandate to surrender 90% of taxable income to shareholders is not charity-it is survival. The IRS, that unyielding overseer, demands it. And so, the REIT scours the earth for Agency mortgage-backed securities, non-agency mortgages, and servicing rights, leveraging its capital like a gambler in a storm. Fixed-rate returns, low-risk, but the dice are loaded. Still, it rolls them.
The grumblers on social media are having a field day, spewing more negativity than a sourpuss at a candy factory. 🍬😠 Santiment, the wise old owl of analytics, chirps that this grumbling is “far more” than usual. But hold your horses, dear readers! Could this be the universe’s way of saying, “Brace yourselves for a rocket launch!”? 🚀
The Hong Kong Insurance Authority, ever the architect of a new financial purgatory, has unveiled regulations that permit insurers to dabble in digital assets. Yet, the price of entry? A 100% risk premium, a cruel jest for those who dare to gamble with the unknown. 🧠💸
Trump Media & Technology Group, bless their ambitious little hearts, has decided that cryptocurrency is, well, possibly worth a look. Forty million dollars’ worth of a look, to be precise. Which, let’s be honest, is enough to buy a small country’s supply of tea and biscuits.☕
Representatives Max Miller and Steven Horsford, two stars in the bipartisan constellation, unveil a proposal so bold it could make a camel blush. They aim to tie cryptocurrencies to traditional securities, a move as daring as trying to herd cats with a net. 🐱🚫
After briefly emerging from the financial equivalent of a dumpster behind a 7-Eleven, Dogecoin rallied enough to make day traders forget it’s literally named after a Shiba Inu meme. It climbed past $0.130, which in traditional finance would be embarrassing, but in crypto counts as a “historic breakout.”
Kaspersky, the vigilant guardian of the digital realm, has raised the alarm on a new foe named Stealka, a parasite that feeds on the data of crypto enthusiasts. 🛡️
