Last week, Fed Chair Jerome “The Rate Cutter” Powell hinted they’re still on track to slice interest rates like a deli worker on a lunch rush. 🥪 Meanwhile, the market’s got one eye on Trump’s 100% China tariff deadline-November 1st, folks! Mark your calendars, or don’t, we’re not your mom. 📅
In the autumn of 2020, when the world teetered on the edge of reason and madness, Shiba Inu emerged-a digital Cerberus with three tails, each wagging to the rhythm of TikTok trends. Its price, then a decimal so minuscule it might have been mistaken for a typo, ballooned into the celestial spheres by 2021. Let us dissect this leviathan: a $500 stake in October 2020 would today purchase a palace in Monaco, assuming palaces were priced at $50 million and Monaco had not yet succumbed to the sea.
So, Jack Dorsey-yes, the man who once ruled Twitter and still thinks he’s some sort of Bitcoin prophet-made a remark that had people scratching their heads. He said, “Bitcoin is not crypto.” Sounds simple, right? WRONG. The internet nearly exploded, but don’t worry, David Schwartz is here to clear things up with some linguistic wizardry! 🎩✨
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. After a rally that makes a cobra’s strike look sluggish, the question isn’t just “Should I buy?” but “Why is this even a question? Did I miss a memo?” Let’s dissect this quantum conundrum like we’re untangling a knot of Christmas lights-grudgingly, and with zero patience.
Advanced Micro Devices, long the plucky suitor to the semiconductor industry’s belle of the ball, now declares itself a “leader” in AI accelerators. One might be forgiven for imagining a team of engineers in Santa Clara, clutching their blueprints like debutantes at a ball, whispering: “Surely this time, we shall tread upon the prince’s toes.” Their Instinct MI300 chip, they claim, nips at Nvidia’s heels with “competitive performance tiers”-though one suspects the gap remains wider than a London taxi’s turning radius.
Ah, what a glorious circus this week promises to be, where the mighty corporations of the S&P 500 stumble forth to confess their earnings like repentant sinners at a carnival! Around 10% shall shuffle in, while U.S. crude oil inventories barge in on Wednesday like an uninvited guest at a feast. Thursday brings September’s existing home sales skipping merrily, only for Friday to unleash a veritable torrent: CPI inflation roaring, Services PMI pirouetting, and Consumer Sentiment waltzing as if they’re at a ball! With the Fed’s looming meeting like a ghostly apparition just a week away, traders clutch their hats against the typhoon of volatility-surely these phantasmagoric numbers will conjure or banish dreams of rate cuts! 🙃
So, Vitalik’s GKR protocol is here, and it’s like a turbo boost for zero-knowledge computations. 🚗💨 Published on Oct. 20 on his blog vitalik.eth.limo (yes, that’s a real thing), this tutorial breaks down the Goldwasser-Kalai-Rothblum protocol. Fancy name, but basically, it’s proof aggregation on steroids. 💪
What constitutes an “unstoppable” dividend? A company that, like a stubborn vine, climbs through the cracks of economic despair, its dividends blooming even in the shadow of collapse. Realty Income, that real estate investment trust (REIT) with a ticker as unassuming as its reputation, has sustained its dividend for three decades, a feat akin to a clockwork mechanism ticking through wars, depressions, and pandemics. One might say it is less a stock and more a relic, its dividend a sacred flame passed from one generation to the next.
When the market decides to get moody (spoiler: it always does), having reliable dividends in your back pocket can help. So let’s dive into two consumer goods stocks that are kind of a big deal when it comes to dividend payments-making now the perfect time to either load up or jump in for the first time. Prepare to get a little richer. Or at least, less poor.
If you were to squint at the on-chain data, you’d notice wallet nomads hoarding BTC like it’s Bitcoin-flavored candy. And let’s not forget the intrepid institutional investors, who’ve taken a liking to spot ETFs after a summer siesta. Meanwhile, market valuation metrics are practically throwing a sigh of relief, indicating that Bitcoin isn’t overzealous, perhaps because it hasn’t blasted off too soon-leaving plenty of escape velocity before end-of-year fireworks.