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Before the opening bell had even begun its infernal toll, we get a shiny little note from Parker Lane over at Stifel. He’s not just a typical analyst, mind you. This is a man who has never met a stock he couldn’t fall in love with, and Braze? Oh, he’s got eyes for it like a predator locked onto its next meal. A solid buy recommendation and a price target of $40 per share-remember that number. It might mean something in this hellscape, or it might just be the musings of a man who’s seen too many numbers and not enough sunshine.

What lies behind this modest uptick? Why, a rather impressive $3.2 billion in fresh capital, courtesy of a clever flotation of zero-coupon convertible senior notes. The fortunate buyers, as always, remain elusive, as Alibaba chose to withhold the identities of these “certain non-U.S. persons”-a term as delightfully vague as it is ominous. A stroke of subtlety, perhaps, in the murky world of international finance.

But don’t get too giddy just yet, investors. Here’s where the plot thickens like a stale bong hit. The REX-Osprey XRP ETF (under the proposed ticker: XRPR) isn’t your garden-variety crypto fund. Oh no, this is something entirely different-tangled in the bureaucratic webs of the SEC but cunningly structured to bypass the usual delays. The result? A faster approval process, sure-but what’s the price of that speed? And more importantly, is this thing a good deal or a massive crypto-flavored gut punch?

But then something truly peculiar happened. Around September 2nd, the stock did something that even seasoned financial wizards didn’t expect: it bucked the trend. Shares jumped about 17% (and a whopping 28% from the lowest point on September 3rd). Now, in the world of reverse stock splits, this is like a unicorn suddenly deciding to take up knitting. The question that inevitably arises: can Lucid keep the momentum going, or is this merely a fleeting moment of whimsy?

Plug Power likes to paint itself as a trailblazer in the hydrogen space. It’s the kind of company that gets all excited about building everything from electrolyzers to liquid hydrogen, and of course, fuel cell systems, storage tanks, and fueling infrastructure. It’s like they’re building the “Tesla” of hydrogen, but with more nerdy gadgets and far fewer shiny electric cars.

The market, ever the drama queen, threw a 12.2% stock surge in celebration. As of 11:22 a.m. ET, Lyft stock was up 12.2% on the news.

In a world where breakthrough drugs are scarce as water in a desert, the data tells a powerful story: patients treated with a once-daily 30 mg dose of brepocitinib showed significant improvement over those on a placebo. In fact, the results were so striking that they illuminated all nine key secondary endpoints as well. But even in triumph, there’s caution-no adverse events like malignancies or cardiovascular issues reared their ugly heads in greater numbers than among those receiving the placebo. Safety remains a cautious companion in this fight against disease.

The Fed, that great machination of monetary policy, has not performed such a cut in nearly nine months, since the modest cut of 0.25% on December 18, 2024. The period of stagnation has been long, and now, the air is thick with anticipation. But why, dear reader, would the Fed decide to make such a move? Surely, inflation continues to hold its devilish grip, having reached 2.9%, still high above the sacred 2% target. Ah, but there is something else: the fragile pulse of the job market. Anemic, perhaps. The figures do not lie. Or perhaps, they do-but still, the concern is palpable.