SCOTUS Slaps Down Trump Tariffs: Crypto Market Cheers, But Is It Just Whistling Past the Nuclear Silo?

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The crypto market, like a weary farmer tending to a drought-stricken field, showed signs of cautious hope on Friday after the US Supreme Court handed Donald Trump a judicial backhand. The justices, in their robes of wisdom, declared his tariff tantrum unconstitutional, and the market responded with the enthusiasm of a dog spotting a squirrel-briefly, then back to napping.

  • The crypto market rose after the Supreme Court struck down Trump’s tariffs, as if the justices had tossed a bone to a pack of speculative wolves.
  • Bitcoin and most tokens rose modestly, while the stock market erased the earlier losses, all of it smelling faintly of desperation.
  • The ongoing recovery may be short-lived, like a fireworks show during a blackout-bright, flashy, and over by dawn.

Bitcoin (BTC) price climbed to $68,200, a number that glimmered like a mirage in the desert of investor anxiety. The market capitalization of all coins swelled by nearly 1%, reaching $2.3 trillion-enough to buy a small asteroid, though probably not enough to buy peace of mind. Kite, Morpho, LayerZero, and Render danced higher by over 6%, as if they’d been promised a seat at the next round of regulatory hearings.

The stock market, too, shrugged off its gloom, with the Dow Jones and Nasdaq 100 indices rising by over 0.50%. One might call it a truce between hope and panic, though the terms were written in pencil and easily erased.

In the court’s ruling, Chief Justice John Robert led the majority in declaring Trump’s emergency tariff powers a constitutional no-no, a decision that read like a schoolteacher scolding a child for eating crayons. The dissenters-Thomas, Kavanaugh, and Alito-sat muttering like grumpy old men who’d lost a bet on the Super Bowl. Congress, meanwhile, remained the real boss of tariffs, a role it embraced with the enthusiasm of a teenager assigned to clean the garage.

Crypto Market Gains Could Be Short-Lived

Still, the gains in the stock and crypto markets may vanish faster than a mirage in a sandstorm. While the ruling is a setback for Trump, he’s got a toolbox full of regulatory wrenches, hammers, and crowbars to keep the tariff party going. Some of these tools require lengthy investigations, like waiting for paint to dry, while others expire before they can be used-though Trump, a man of impatience, might try anyway.

Complicating matters further is the looming shadow of an Iran war, a potential sideshow in this grand opera of chaos. Reports whisper of Trump assembling military hardware in the Middle East like a child building a fortress with Duplo blocks, with an attack possibly arriving this weekend. Polymarket odds have jumped, as if the gods of geopolitics are playing a cruel joke on everyone involved.

An Iranian strike, should it come, would tighten the noose around the Strait of Hormuz, a vital artery for oil. Inflation would spike like a startled cat, and the Federal Reserve’s hopes for interest rate cuts would evaporate faster than a snowman in a sauna. Meanwhile, crypto prices wobble on thin legs, with futures open interest and ETF outflows racing toward the exits like passengers on a sinking ship. Bitcoin and Ethereum ETFs have bled billions, and futures open interest has shrunk from $250 billion to below $100 billion-proof that the market’s dance with uncertainty is far from over.

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2026-02-20 19:18