Ferguson’s Stock: A 9.8% Leap and the Eternal Struggle of Numbers

Ferguson’s Q4 revenue swelled 6.9% year-over-year to $8.5 billion, a number that, in the grand scheme of things, is roughly as impressive as a teapot orbiting Saturn. Adjusted earnings per share leapt from $2.98 to $3.48-a 17% increase that would have made a 1920s stockbroker weep with nostalgia. Analysts, those modern-day oracles of spreadsheets, had penciled in earnings near $3.29 on $8.7 billion in revenue. Ferguson’s results, therefore, were a masterclass in statistical sleight of hand: just enough to satisfy, just enough to confuse, and absolutely nothing to write home about-unless your home is a server farm in Nebraska.

Crypto’s Secret Plumbing: Bitwise Dives into Stablecoins & Tokenized ETFs-Brace for the Madness!

On a gloriously mundane September 16, 2025, Bitwise Funds Trust submitted a post-effective amendment-because why file just once when you can file again, and again?-for their Stablecoin and Tokenization ETF. The plan: 75 days from ink to reality under the cryptic Rule 485(a)(2). Curiously, the listing exchange and ticker were left as blank slates, perhaps an existential wink to the unpredictability of crypto markets. 🤷‍♂️

This Crypto Caper: Galaxy Digital’s Tokenized Triumph & Solana Snatch! 💰🚀

The fund, scheduled for a debut sometime between here and the next tea break, vows to pirouette gracefully across Ethereum, Solana, and Stellar. Though, don’t get your knickers in a twist-Galaxy won’t be throwing their whole blockchain brigade at once. Anchorage Digital has nobly volunteered to play custodian, probably because someone has to keep the crypto cookies from disappearing. 🍪

Dollar Drops Like a Bad Joke in 2025-You Won’t Believe What Happens Next! 💸😂

Dollar dropping like a hot potato

Over on Wall Street, they call it a “rotation.” Meanwhile, Main Street is yelling “Hey! Why is my sandwich now mortgage-worthy?” The DXY index, that infamous scoreboard of dollar muscles, is showing off one of the sharpest slides since someone said “Trust me, it’s fine” to the economy. Exporters are beaming like they just got free snacks; importers? Well, they’re recalculating faster than you can say “tariffs.”

Why Webtoon Entertainment Stock Soared More Than 40% Today

It all began, if we can still call it that, just a month ago-on the 12th of August, to be precise. Webtoon and Disney exchanged some sort of cordial agreement, the details of which involved an extravagant selection of 100 comics from the pantheon of Star Wars, Spider-Man, Avengers, Alien, and the sacred Disney brand itself. A deal, no doubt, to tantalize the imagination of every comic lover and, incidentally, to inject a bit of life into Webtoon’s floundering fortunes.

Opendoor’s Illusory Rebirth: A Market Mirage or a Step into the Abyss?

When retail investors-those impish rebels-conjured a rally that rivaled the spectral GameStop episode, one could almost hear the faint sound of angels crying over the chaos they wrought. As for the boardroom, there was no mercy for CEO Carrie Wheeler-ousted, like so many before her, in the wake of the storm stirred by activist investors. Now, the company seems to be at the mercy of the whims of a new captain. And yet, one wonders: will this new leader be the architect of Opendoor’s salvation or simply a mere figurehead in a collapsing house of cards?

Crypto Funds See $3.3 Billion Comeback, Bitcoin And Ethereum Lead Rebound

As expected, the usual suspects-Bitcoin and Ethereum-took the lead, showing us once again why they are the top dogs of the crypto world. Bitcoin had a particularly stellar week, attracting a hefty $2.4 billion, its biggest weekly inflow since July. It seems like the sentiment surrounding Bitcoin is as bullish as a charging bull in a china shop. Short-Bitcoin products, on the other hand, weren’t as lucky, with modest outflows pushing their AuM to a humble $86 million. Better luck next time!

Bloom Energy’s Stock: A Rocket Ride to $85?

Wall Street, the late bloomers of the party, have finally caught the Bloom Energy buzz. Today, Morgan Stanley gave the stock a midlife crisis-level price target hike-from $44 to $85-because apparently, $44 wasn’t *fueled enough* for their spreadsheets. At noon ET, shares were up 7.2%, which is basically the stock market’s version of a standing ovation… if ovations had ticker symbols.