Epstein, Israel, and Bitcoin: A Farce in Three Acts

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Ah, the Epstein files-a veritable treasure trove of conspiracy fodder, where every whisper is a tempest and every shadow a specter of intrigue. The latest? A tale so preposterous, so delightfully absurd, that one can only marvel at the audacity of its conception. Israel, it seems, has been accused of orchestrating a clandestine coup of the Bitcoin network, a digital heist of such grandeur that it would make even the most seasoned cryptographer blush with envy. And yet, here we are, dissecting this farce with the gravity it so clearly does not deserve.

The claim, propagated by the inimitable SwanDesk CEO Jacob King, alleges that Israel has been pulling the strings of the Bitcoin marionette for over a decade. A document, purportedly from the Epstein archives, suggests a dalliance between Jeffrey Epstein and Joichi Ito, wherein Bitcoin core developers were showered with “hidden gifts.” One can only imagine the nature of these gifts-perhaps a lifetime supply of artisanal blockchain-themed tea? The mind reels.

King, with a flourish worthy of a Victorian novelist, further asserts that Israel footed the bill for 60% of Bitcoin developers. A generous patron, indeed, though one wonders if these developers were also treated to complimentary hummus and falafel as part of their remuneration package. Epstein and Israel, it seems, were also major investors in Blockstream, a company so influential that it could allegedly manipulate Bitcoin’s price and code. How quaint.

But let us not be swayed by such theatrics. Coinpedia, ever the arbiter of truth in this digital Wild West, has stepped in to separate fact from fiction. And what have they found? A dearth of evidence, a void so profound that it echoes with the laughter of the absurd.

The Allegations, Deconstructed

  • Israel’s Bitcoin Dominion: The U.S. Department of Justice, in its infinite wisdom, has found no substantiated evidence to support this claim. Alas, the grand conspiracy crumbles like a poorly baked soufflé.

The notion that Israel paid 60% of Bitcoin core developers remains unsupported, a phantom without form or substance. No documents, no payrolls, no centralized hiring-just the whispers of a fevered imagination.

  • Epstein’s Blockstream Investment: A mere $850,000, donated to MIT between 2002 and 2017, hardly constitutes control or major ownership. One might as well claim dominion over a bakery for purchasing a single croissant.

In 2015, some of this money was used to pay the salaries of Bitcoin Core developers like Gavin Andresen and Wladimir van der Laan. A noble gesture, perhaps, but hardly the stuff of global conspiracies.

Israel’s Tangential Connections

The Israeli link, such as it is, revolves around former Prime Minister Ehud Barak, who stayed at Epstein’s New York home several times between 2013 and 2017. A damning coincidence, no doubt, though one suspects Barak was more interested in the complimentary toiletries than in plotting Bitcoin’s demise.

Epstein, ever the socialite, also acted as a backchannel for Israeli interests, arranging security deals in various countries. A man of many talents, it seems, though his prowess in cryptocurrency remains unproven.

In 2015, Epstein donated $850,000 to the MIT Media Lab, where prominent Israeli figures like designer Neri Oxman held senior positions. A nexus of intrigue, perhaps, but one that falls far short of a Bitcoin takeover.

Epstein’s connection to Bitcoin infrastructure is equally tenuous. In 2014, he joined an $18 million funding round for Blockstream, though his stake was quickly sold, and the company has since severed all financial ties with him. A fleeting association, at best.

In 2014, during Blockstream’s seed-round investor roadshow, the company was introduced to then MIT Media Lab director Joi Ito. Subsequently Blockstream met with Jeffrey Epstein, who was described at the time as a limited partner in Ito’s fund. That fund later invested a minority…

– Adam Back (@adam3us) February 1, 2026

  • Tether’s Unrelated Allegations: Claims that Bitcoin’s price can be manipulated using “unbacked Tether” are separate and unproven. A red herring, if ever there was one, and one that does nothing to substantiate the notion of Israeli control over Bitcoin.

The Verdict: A Farce Unmasked

Claim Made by Theory Coinpedia’s Counter-Evidence
Does Israel Hijack Control of the Bitcoin Network? No substantiated evidence, says the U.S. Department of Justice.
Did Epstein fund a Bitcoin takeover? A minor, indirect investment of $50,000 and $500,000-hardly a coup.
Were 60% of devs paid by Israel? No documents to support this claim.

Conclusion: The Emperor’s New Conspiracy

Claim Do the Epstein Files Reveal Israel Hijacked Control of the Bitcoin Network?
Verdict False
Fact-Check by Coinpedia As per Coinpedia’s research and a review of official sources, there is no credible evidence that Israel controls Bitcoin, pays core developers, or manipulates the network through Blockstream or Tether. Until then, this claim remains unverified and speculative-a farce fit for the annals of absurdity.

And so, dear reader, we bid adieu to this tale of intrigue and folly. Let us raise a glass to the conspirators, whose imaginations, if nothing else, are truly boundless. After all, in the theater of the absurd, every whisper is a plot, and every shadow a specter of intrigue. Cheers!

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2026-02-03 12:22