
The black gold is bleeding, folks. Brent crude took a swan dive today – nearly 5% vanished into the ether, settling around $66 a barrel. WTI wasn’t far behind, choking on a similar fate, flirting with the $62 mark. And ConocoPhillips [COP 1.54%]? They’re feeling it. A 2.5% haircut as of this morning. The market, that insatiable beast, is ALWAYS hungry.
The OPEC+ Puzzle
OPEC+, that shadowy cabal of oil sheiks and Russian oligarchs, announced last night they’re still holding back on boosting production. Despite the “healthy oil market fundamentals” – a phrase that translates roughly to “we’re squeezing every last drop out of you” – they’re maintaining the status quo. You’d think that’d send prices soaring, right? Supply and demand, basic economics… but this isn’t economics, it’s a goddamn carnival ride. Prices are DOWN. DOWN, I TELL YOU!
The explanation, as always, is buried in the geopolitical swamp. For weeks, the market was buzzing with whispers of a potential U.S.-Iran dust-up. A conflict in the Persian Gulf? That would’ve sent oil prices into the stratosphere. But then… sanity, or something resembling it, intervened. Talks. Negotiations. The mere suggestion of diplomacy is enough to deflate the war premium. It’s enough to make a man question everything. Everything!
So, the immediate threat evaporated, and the market exhaled. A collective sigh of relief… and a corresponding drop in prices. The sharks are circling, the vultures are gathering… it’s a beautiful, terrifying sight. They say there’s an oil glut brewing, despite OPEC’s desperate denials. A glut! The audacity! It’s enough to drive a sane man to drink… or invest in volatility ETFs.
What Does This Mean for ConocoPhillips?
It means the primary product ConocoPhillips pushes is suddenly worth a bit less. Shocking, I know. The stock is taking a beating, naturally. But here’s the kicker: at less than 15 times earnings and with a dividend yield north of 3%, ConocoPhillips is looking… cheap. Almost suspiciously cheap. Is it a bargain? A trap? A slow descent into madness? I haven’t the faintest idea. But I’m buying anyway. Because in this business, sometimes you just have to roll the dice and pray you don’t land on bankruptcy.
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2026-02-02 19:42