Ripple: Or, How I Stopped Worrying and (Maybe) Invested in Crypto

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Right. So, everyone’s obsessed with AI, aren’t they? It’s the new black. Which is fine, I suppose. It’s just… exhausting. All that breathless optimism. It reminds me of the dot-com bubble, only this time it’s algorithms. I mean, don’t get me wrong, robots are probably coming for our jobs, but it feels a bit… predictable. Which is why, rather against my better judgment, I’ve been looking at Ripple. Or, as the tech-bros call it, XRP.

It’s a blockchain company, apparently. Which, let’s be honest, sounds like something you’d find in a particularly pretentious artisanal coffee shop. But they claim to be building the “rails” of the future financial system. “Rails.” Honestly. It’s like they’re trying to convince me it’s a sensible investment using railway metaphors. Still, I’ve made worse decisions. Like that perm in 1998.

Ripple: What Is It, Exactly?

Apparently, Ripple’s been around since 2012. A decade, which in internet years is approximately a geological epoch. They’ve made friends with banks, which is a bit alarming, frankly. Banks are generally the villains in my personal financial narrative. But they’re promising faster, cheaper international payments. Which, okay, is a good thing. Though I suspect the banks are mostly interested in taking a slightly smaller cut of the pie, rather than altruism.

And then there’s the XRP token. Currently fifth largest cryptocurrency, they say. Which sounds impressive until you remember how many cryptocurrencies there are. It had a little run recently, going from 50 cents to $3.40. Which is… a lot. Standard Chartered thinks it could hit $12.50 by 2028. Honestly, I’m starting to feel irresponsible not investing. Though I’m also pretty sure my financial advisor is currently weeping into his spreadsheet.

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The really scary part? Ripple owns a lot of XRP. Like, 45% of it. Which feels… precarious. It’s like they’re holding all the cards, and also the entire house of cards. They’ve got about $90 billion worth of the stuff. Which explains how they managed to raise $500 million last year at a $40 billion valuation. It’s all a bit… circular, isn’t it?

They had a spat with the SEC, which is always a good sign. Apparently, they’re back now, having spent $2.5 billion on blockchainy things. Which, given the current climate, feels like throwing money into a very fashionable, very volatile black hole.

How to Get Involved (Or, How I’m Slowly Losing My Mind)

Right. The problem. Ripple isn’t publicly traded. Which means no easy way to throw money at it. You can buy XRP directly, which feels… reckless. Or you can invest in those new XRP ETFs. Which feels… slightly less reckless. Or you can invest in companies that just hoard XRP. Which feels… deeply, profoundly strange. It’s like buying shares in a very expensive digital paperweight.

Units of Cryptocurrency Lost: 0 (so far). Hours Spent Watching Charts: 12. Number of Panicked Texts to Friends: 37. Number of Times I’ve Considered Selling Everything and Becoming a Beekeeper: 4.

Reinventing the financial system is hard. Really hard. And probably impossible. But if anyone’s going to try, it’s Ripple. Or, at least, they have a very good marketing department. I’m still not entirely sure what any of this means. But I’ve got a nagging feeling I’m supposed to be excited. And honestly, after years of sensible investing, a little bit of irrational exuberance might be just what I need. Or it might be the beginning of the end. We shall see.

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2026-01-28 18:53