
The whispers concerning Artificial Intelligence, you see, have reached even the most secluded corners of the pharmaceutical world. It is not, as the optimists proclaim, a golden age of discovery, but rather a frantic scramble, a desperate attempt to automate the inevitable failures that plague all human endeavor. And within this chaotic ballet of algorithms and ambition, one name surfaces with a frequency that borders on the unsettling: Eli Lilly. Not, mind you, because of any inherent brilliance, but because, in a field populated by charlatans and dreamers, they are…competent. A most unsettling quality, competence.
They speak of ‘investing for the long term,’ twenty years they say. As if time itself were a reliable partner, not a relentless thief. But let us indulge this fancy, for a moment. Let us consider Eli Lilly, not as a beacon of innovation, but as a particularly well-maintained machine, grinding away at the problem of human frailty. A machine, I might add, increasingly reliant on these…digital assistants.
A Most Curious Obsession with Calculation
It appears Eli Lilly has fallen prey to the delusion that problems can be solved through the application of numbers. They are, I am told, ‘doubling down’ on Artificial Intelligence. As if a greater quantity of calculation will somehow overcome the fundamental absurdity of existence. They have launched something called ‘TuneLab,’ a platform for…drug discovery. It is offered, gratuitously, to smaller biotech firms. A gesture of magnanimity? Perhaps. Or perhaps a clever scheme to gather more data, like a spider collecting flies for its ever-growing web. They claim these smaller firms lack the ‘funds or data’ to train their own models. A polite way of saying they are insignificant, and their data, therefore, readily available.
Then there is the partnership with Nvidia, to build a ‘supercomputer.’ A truly magnificent undertaking, if one ignores the fact that supercomputers, like all machines, are prone to breakdowns. Imagine, if you will, a vast network of wires and circuits, humming with power, only to be brought to a standstill by a single, errant electron. The irony, of course, is exquisite.
And finally, a laboratory in the San Francisco Bay Area, also in partnership with Nvidia. A hive of activity, buzzing with researchers and engineers, all frantically trying to accelerate the process of…what, exactly? The creation of more pills? More potions? More temporary reprieves from the inevitable?
If, by some miracle, this all leads to a reduction in research and development costs, it will not be due to brilliance, but to luck. A fortunate alignment of algorithms and circumstance. And even then, the benefits will be fleeting, like a dream upon waking.
The Illusion of Progress
Beyond these digital distractions, there is the matter of weight loss. Eli Lilly, it seems, is a leader in this field. A curious distinction, to be sure. To profit from the vanity and self-indulgence of others. But then, what is capitalism, if not the art of exploiting human weakness? They speak of a ‘rapidly growing market.’ As if the increasing prevalence of obesity is something to celebrate. A testament to our ingenuity? Or a sign of our decline?
They assure us that the company has a ‘strong pipeline’ of new products. A pipeline, I suspect, filled with more of the same. Slightly modified versions of existing drugs, repackaged and rebranded. A perpetual motion machine of incremental improvement. And when the patents expire, they will, of course, find new ways to protect their profits. New formulations, new delivery systems, new marketing schemes. The game, you see, never ends.
They claim to have ‘strong innovative capabilities.’ A bold assertion, considering that most innovation is simply the rediscovery of old ideas. And even when something truly new emerges, it is often met with skepticism and resistance. The world, you see, is not always ready for progress. It prefers the comfort of the familiar, even if it is flawed.
So, should you invest in Eli Lilly? Perhaps. But do not delude yourself into thinking that you are buying a piece of the future. You are simply placing a wager on the continuation of the present. A most peculiar investment, indeed.
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2026-01-26 15:13