Once upon a time, not long ago, the crypto whizz-kids were prancing about like peacocks, all giddy with excitement because Donald Trump was polishing his red tie and getting ready to waltz back into the White House! But oh dear, how the tables have turned! 🎭
- The Senate Banking Committee decided to hit the pause button on a rather important stablecoin bill after Coinbase threw in the towel, saying “no thank you.”
- Crypto bigwigs, despite their shiny dreams of a 2024 Trump victory parade, still believe they’re getting the short end of the stick compared to those old-fashioned banks and global markets.
- Senator Lummis stepped in with a cheeky comment that crypto’s sulky response shows they’re as ready for regulation as a cat is for a bath.
On a particularly gloomy Wednesday, the much-ballyhooed stablecoin bill found itself stuck in the Senate, leaving digital-asset firms clutching their wallets tighter than a squirrel holding onto its last acorn. 🐿️
The crypto bunch, having spent ages convincing themselves that Trump would sprinkle magical gold dust everywhere, now looked like toddlers who were denied a second scoop of ice cream. 🍦 Coinbase Global and its pals were quick to throw a tantrum after the Senate Banking Committee said, “Nope, not today!” just hours after Coinbase decided to take its ball and go home.
What caused this kerfuffle? Well, it turns out there are some pesky limits on how much “reward” these crypto kids can offer on their stablecoin holdings. Yes, those very same stablecoins that once made everyone think the Trump train was unstoppable are now causing a bit of a panic in their posh boardrooms.
And guess what? The stock market didn’t exactly throw a confetti party either! Coinbase took a nosedive of 6.4% by the end of trading on Thursday. Circle followed suit, plummeting nearly 10%-as if they had all slipped on banana peels! 🍌
This new bill could even ban stablecoin yields altogether! Talk about a bummer! Some reward schemes might survive, but the crypto execs are squinting at the legal jargon like it’s a particularly nasty crossword puzzle. According to Bloomberg, Nana Murugesan, a former Coinbase bigwig, summed it up nicely: “The law is not straightforward”-well, isn’t that the understatement of the century?
Stablecoins have been luring users in with promises of juicy yields, making them think, “Why cash out when my digital dough can earn me… more digital dough?” It’s like a never-ending loop of money-making magic! But banks are raising their eyebrows like a concerned parent, warning that these yield-yielding stablecoins might just take their precious deposits away.
Coinbase’s CEO, Brian Armstrong-a proud Trump cheerleader-decided to share his woes on X, grumbling that they were pulling support due to “too many issues.” Oh, the drama! 🎭
‘They’re Not Ready’
Senator Cynthia Lummis didn’t mince her words either. She tweeted that crypto’s over-the-top reaction “proves they just are not ready”-a gentle reminder that, even with Trump’s political magic, the markets-and lawmakers-have moods of their own! Who knew? 🌪️
Read More
- 39th Developer Notes: 2.5th Anniversary Update
- Gold Rate Forecast
- You Should Not Let Your Kids Watch These Cartoons
- Here’s Whats Inside the Nearly $1 Million Golden Globes Gift Bag
- ‘Bugonia’ Tops Peacock’s Top 10 Most-Watched Movies List This Week Once Again
- The Hidden Treasure in AI Stocks: Alphabet
- South Korea’s Wild Bitcoin ETF Gamble: Can This Ever Work?
- TV Pilots Rejected by Networks
- Shocking Split! Electric Coin Company Leaves Zcash Over Governance Row! 😲
- Live-Action Movies That Whitewashed Anime Characters Fans Loved
2026-01-16 02:21