Alphabet: AI’s Unlikely Overlord

by

If you’re seeking an AI stock to own next year, you might find yourself staring at your phone, which is probably running Android, and wondering if this is a sign from the universe (or just a particularly persistent ghost in the machine). Alphabet (GOOGL) (GOOG) is often touted as a top pick, but let’s not confuse a well-organized sock drawer with a fortress. (It’s like the universe decided to give you a free pass, but you’re still paying for it in taxes.)

Loading widget...

A search and AI leader

Alphabet today is more than Google search, but that’s still its largest business-like a chef who’s also a janitor, but somehow the janitorial skills are the real money-maker. Its dominance starts with distribution: Chrome and Android, which have more than 70% market share. (It’s like having a monopoly on the air you breathe, but with more ads.)

The company’s revenue-sharing deal with Apple ensures Google remains the default search engine for most of the world, except China, where it’s apparently too polite to compete. Meanwhile, it’s infusing AI into search with Gemini models, which is like teaching a parrot to recite Shakespeare-impressive, but does it count as a revolution?

Alphabet’s data advantage is staggering: decades of behavioral data, YouTube’s video libraries, and a two-sided ad network that could rival a medieval guild. (It’s the digital equivalent of having a library, a museum, and a monopoly on gossip.)

Beyond search

Alphabet’s cloud computing division is growing at 32%, which is impressive until you realize it’s like watching a toddler eat a cake-exciting, but not exactly a long-term strategy. Its vertically integrated model includes custom AI chips and a fiber network. (It’s like building a spaceship in your garage, but with more bureaucracy.)

The pending acquisition of Wiz is a cybersecurity move, but let’s not confuse a patch with a firewall. Meanwhile, Waymo’s robotaxi fleet is expanding, but it’s still trying to figure out how to navigate a parking lot without a map. (It’s the digital equivalent of a toddler learning to walk-stumbling, but with a lot of potential.)

A cheap stock

Despite all this, Alphabet trades at a P/E ratio of less than 24. That’s cheaper than a bag of stale crisps, but does it mean it’s a bargain? Or just a sign that the market is waiting for the other shoe to drop? (It’s like buying a lottery ticket with a 1 in a million chance of winning, but the jackpot is a lifetime supply of existential dread.)

Alphabet is a stock that could outperform in 2026, but only if the universe decides to be kind. This is a stock you’ll want to invest in-assuming you’re not allergic to the idea of being part of a digital empire. 🧠

Read More

2025-10-18 14:41