Alphabet Hits $3 Trillion, Courtesy of Wall Street Hype

Well, butter my biscuit and call me a shareholder, Alphabet (GOOG) (GOOGL) has moseyed its way into the $3 trillion club, and the fanfare is so loud you’d think they’d invented money itself.

And wouldn’t you know it, Citigroup gets the credit, bless their polished boots.

What Citi has to say (or sell) about Google

Alphabet stock decided to take a 3% stroll upwards this morning, just around the time Citi decided to wave its magic wand and raise its price target to $280 a share. That’s a 24% jump, which, according to them, means you might still squeeze another 12% out of it in the coming year if you believe in fairy tales.

Why did Citi do this? Artificial intelligence, of course. Nothing like a newfangled algorithm to set grown men’s hearts aflutter.

“Greater regulatory clarity,” says Citi, which apparently translates to Alphabet promising to spit out new products faster than a Mississippi steamboat can burn coal. They’re especially keen on Alphabet rolling out its Gemini AI across all corners of their empire, which sounds impressive until you realize it’s mostly just a fancy way to keep ads and cloud services humming while Wall Street cheers from the sidelines.

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Is Alphabet stock worth your nickel?

If you’re putting your trust in Citi’s crystal ball, I hope you like gambling with the family silver. Alphabet has poured cash into AI like a riverboat gambler pouring whiskey-lavish, reckless, and with a gleam of hubris.

free cash flow grew a meager 11% over the last three years, which in Wall Street speak is practically a polite cough.

So, sure, Alphabet may be the sheriff in AI town. But growth stock? That’s a tale that needs a bigger horse. Until that story changes, I wouldn’t be placing any bets faster than a greased pig at the county fair. 🐖

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2025-09-15 19:22