Cleveland Fed President Declares ‘No’ to Rate Cuts-Bitcoin Plummets like a Stone! 💸😂

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Ah, the delightful details! 🌪️

  • Our illustrious Cleveland Fed President, Mme Hammack, has determined that the heavens do not align for a rate reduction! Who would’ve guessed? 🎩
  • By her spectral utterance, we see that Chairman Powell remains enveloped in a cloak of hawkish approval, holding tight to his lofty perch in the central bank! 🦅
  • As if following a tragic play, Bitcoin took a tumble to a session’s nadir-less than $113,000-faster than a cat can bat at a feathery toy! 🐱‍👤

In this bewildering article

BTCBTC$112,685.41◢1.03%

As markets engage in the fine art of recalibration-perhaps a chaotic dance reminiscent of Igor Stravinsky-previous high hopes for a rapid rate cut have been dashed like dreams in a tempestuous storm. All gather ’round at Jackson Hole, for the Kansas City Fed’s Economic Symposium is upon us! 🎺

Alas, said the perspicacious Cleveland Fed President, “The current data speaks naught of a lovely September ease,” during her tranquil discourse with Yahoo News amidst the picturesque backdrop of Wyoming. Remember that place? Where cowboys roam and inflation shrieks! 🤠

“Inflation may be dancing an exciting tango upwards!” she proclaimed with the certainty of a seasoned seer. “If we were to hold a meeting tomorrow, I would see no semblance of reason for unscrewing the tightening.” The very thought slaps us like a wet fish! 🐟

Certainly, the winds of change are slow to waft through these corridors, as Hammack contended that we shall not truly feel the bite of tariffs until the coming year, leaving us all in a state of suspended animation!⏳

Her prophetic declarations hold weight-Powell remains a hawk in the aviary of finance, undeterred by the dissident doves that have recently stirred up a ruckus in their quest for lower interest rates. Ah, but who shall remain the favored bird? 🎭

Just as a month ago, Bitcoin soared to thrilling heights above $124,000-a meteoric rise akin to a well-oiled carousel!-while everyone expected the Fed to engage in some amiable trimming of rates next month. Oh, how innocent we were! Now that glorious projection crumbles to a mere 71%. What a delightful collapse! 😅

This Friday, markets shall be graced with Powell’s grand presence as he delivers his keynote address. Spoiler alert: we’re not anticipating a dove-like transformation! Instead, expect him to lament the heated state of inflation as if it were a bothersome fly at a picnic, insisting we proceed with cautious ambivalence! 🐦

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2025-08-21 19:51