Chanos, that veteran of market trenches-whose nostrils perpetually flare at the scent of hubris-casts his weary eyes upon Michael Saylor’s latest Bitcoin pilgrimage. Saylor, tormented keeper of Strategy (once MicroStrategy), now conducts experiments before the indifferent gods of finance, adding but a paltry $51 million of “digital gold” to his already swollen treasury. An amount so meager it might barely buy enough existential dread for a winter in Moscow.
The men in expensive suits whisper numbers that would silence even the most boisterous cell of prisoners: Strategy sits atop 629,376 BTC-an icy horde approximating $73.01 billion. And yet, if one peers through the iron bars of market cap-$104 billion strong-they discover the Net Asset Value, a thin, shivering figure of $1.420, so fragile even the gulag cook wouldn’t serve it for lunch.
Once upon a time, Saylor’s Strategy would sweep the Bitcoin market with the grandeur of a Soviet parade, issuing MSTR shares like bread rations during a famine. Now? Only $51 million allotted. The stock room echoes with emptiness. Chanos, positioning himself short-and we shall not call this “contrarian,” but rather “someone who remembers winter”-wags his finger like an old Bolshevik. He remarks (on X, where all modern battles are fought without potatoes): “Not only did MSTR buy just $51M of Bitcoin, due to lack of demand for the preferred ATM’s (at-the-market offerings), but it also looks like Saylor is lowering the 2.5x mNAV floor-‘when otherwise deemed advantageous’ to the Company.” Tragic laughter echoes through the data warehouse.
History records: Strategy’s “small purchases” often precede wild rallies, as if the invisible hand was drunk at a birthday party, tossing confetti on MSTR and BTC alike. But as of this bleak hour, MSTR limps along at $367-a shadow of its glory days, down a hefty 33% from the euphoric mountaintop of $548. Perhaps hope remains. Perhaps not. Certainly, the market is watching. And somewhere, Chanos is still short, preparing tea for a long, cold night.
The only thing hotter than Strategy’s treasuries? The sarcasm in Chanos’ soul. 🚬❄️
Read More
- The Unexpected Triumph of Novo Nordisk: A Dividend Hunter’s Delight
- Gold Rate Forecast
- Bitcoin’s Paradox: Billionaire Buys, Price Stagnates
- Big Sell on Big Data: When Even the Suits Say ‘Enough’s Enough’
- General Hospital Recap, July 23 Episode: Drew Suspects Willow of Stalking Daisy
- XRP On The Brink: Are We About To Witness Crypto Fireworks Or Just Another Fizzle? 🎭
- ETF Exit: A Tale of Diversification and Dwindling Dreams
- Elden Ring’s Switch 2 port delayed into 2026 by FromSoftware for “performance adjustments,” and people are surprisingly OK about it: “I’d rather it releases in a better state”
- Superman Tops Black Adam After Full Week On Nielsen, Outperforms Marvel
- DuPont Dumps Union Pacific: A Chaotic Shift in the Freight of Finance
2025-08-18 21:38