Ah, the great American spectacle! Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, with a flourish worthy of a circus ringmaster, declares that the US is on a sacred quest to amass more Bitcoin for its so-called “Strategic Reserve.” 🌟 What a marvel of modern bureaucracy! As if the federal coffers were not already brimming with confiscated crypto treasures, they now seek to pile more onto their digital dragon’s hoard.
In a thread on X (formerly known as Twitter, for those living under a rock), Bessent proclaims that this endeavor is nothing less than the fulfillment of President Donald Trump’s grandiose vision: to make America the “Bitcoin superpower of the world.” 🦅✨ One can almost hear the trumpets blaring as the nation marches toward this glittering, pixelated destiny.
“Bitcoin, once the spoils of the damned and the foolish, shall now be the cornerstone of our Strategic Bitcoin Reserve,” Bessent intones, as if channeling the spirit of a 19th-century robber baron. “And lo, the Treasury shall explore ‘budget-neutral pathways’ to expand this reserve, for the glory of the President’s promise!” 🏛️💼
Ah, yes, the Strategic Bitcoin Reserve-established in March by Trump himself, who decreed that seized crypto should be stockpiled rather than auctioned off. A wise move, no doubt, for what is a superpower without its hoard of digital gold? 🏦⚖️
Earlier this week, Bessent revealed that the US government already holds a tidy sum of $20 billion in Bitcoin, with no intention of selling. Instead, they plan to bolster their stash with confiscated tokens, as if the federal government were a particularly savvy pirate captain. 🏴☠️
“We’ve entered the 21st century, comrades, with our very own Bitcoin strategic reserve,” Bessent declared, his tone dripping with the kind of pride reserved for unveiling a new monument. “We shall not buy more, but we shall seize and hoard, for our reserve is already valued between $15 and $20 billion!” 🤑📈
According to the crypto analytics platform Arkham, the US government currently holds 198,000 BTC, worth a staggering $23.26 billion. What a treasure trove! One can only imagine the bureaucrats rubbing their hands together in glee as they gaze upon their digital fortune. 💎✨
As of this writing, Bitcoin trades at $117,388, a mere 1% dip in the last 24 hours. But fear not, for the great American Bitcoin dream marches on, undeterred by the whims of the market. 🚀📉
And so, dear reader, we are left to ponder: Is this the dawn of a new era, where the US reigns supreme in the crypto realm, or merely another bureaucratic folly, destined to be forgotten in the annals of history? Only time-and the ever-volatile Bitcoin market-will tell. 🕰️💭
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2025-08-15 22:54