Ether Machine Boss Thinks Bitcoin Is So Last Century – You Won’t Believe This!

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So, Andrew Keys, co-founder of the Ether Machine. This guy—he’s saying Bitcoin is like a landline phone. Really? I mean, who even has a landline anymore? He’s essentially saying, “I’d rather upgrade to an iPhone than keep my rotary phone.” 😄

And guess what? The guy claims he owns zero Bitcoin! Zero! Like he’s on some exclusive Ethereum-only diet. It’s like being in a trendy vegan restaurant and refusing to even look at the steak. A real outlier in the crypto world, this guy. What a character! 🍆

Ethereum Firm Backs This GENIUS Act—Get It? GENIUS?

Apparently, this GENIUS Act is supposed to be the golden ticket for growth—like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but with stablecoins. Approved just a few days ago, it’s setting up some sort of safety net for stablecoin issuers. I don’t know, it kind of sounds like putting guardrails around a rollercoaster. We know you’re still gonna find a way to fall out! 🎢

Now, more than 50% of stablecoins are frolicking on Ethereum’s smart-contract network. That’s right—trillions potentially flowing, giving the validators and dApps some sweet, sweet fee income. I mean, who wouldn’t want a piece of that action? 💰

Smart‑Contract Network: The New Playground for Institutions

Keys is predicting that in no time, institutional players will be swarming Ethereum like it’s a Black Friday sale. He likened Ethereum’s stablecoin situation to Google’s dominance in search. It’s like saying, “Sure, Bing exists, but who’s actually using it?” 🤷‍♂️

Banks and hedge funds? They’ll love handling their cash-like tokens on a network built for programmable money. It’s all so smooth! Meanwhile, Tom Lee from FundStrat believes Ether could leap to $15,000. But hey, he’s still holding onto some Bitcoin. You know, just in case. The guy’s gotta hedge his bets! 🤑

SPAC Listing: Big Money, Bigger Dreams

Now, hold onto your hats: the Ether Machine is teaming up with a SPAC called Dynamix Corporation to list under the ticker ETHM on Nasdaq. Sounds fancy, right? But here’s the kicker, Keys is throwing in $645 million of his own money as an anchor investment. Must be nice to have that kind of cash to toss around. Can I borrow a few bucks? 😅

The goal? A whopping $1.5 billion for a treasury of ETH, staking operations, and some DeFi strategies. So, this isn’t just playing with Monopoly money. Investors like 10T Holdings are already onboard, probably thinking, “What could possibly go wrong?” 😬

Competition: Layer-2s and Other Chains Joining the Party

But wait, there’s more! Some on-chain data suggests activity is migrating to Layer-2 networks like Arbitrum and Optimism. And don’t forget those rival blockchains like Solana and Avalanche sneaking in, grabbing their slice of the stablecoin game. The Ethereum mainnet might just find itself at a party it didn’t want to attend! 🎉

But the real talk? Some analysts are getting all dramatic about a potential cliff in SPAC deal flow. And as if that’s not enough, there’s the looming possibility of regulatory scrutiny hanging over staking services. I mean, how many headaches can one industry take? Gas fees spiking during peak times? That’s just what we need, right? 🙃

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2025-07-24 03:44